insert wittiness here*

Because I can.

2010-01-29T09:33:00.002-05:00

Right now, well right now I'm looking at pictures of Sun Bears. Why? Because I can. And also Sun Bears are cool. There were a couple at Lowry Park Zoo, they might still be there, btu one in particular always stuck with me: it had three legs. I think it's name was Sunny.

When I first got Maisey, I told people she reminded me of a Sun Bear. She still does. And had she not had a cute name when I adopted her (for instance, if her name had still been Diamond, which I sometimes still whisper near her to see if she remembers that name...she kind of does), well I would have named her Sunny or Bear or something that related to a Sun Bear, like Sunny Bear?

I just checked Lowry Park Zoo's site...no more Sun Bears.

[Photo Credit: Wellington Zoo Web site]

What? Again? Within a week?

2010-01-06T09:27:00.002-05:00

Good morning world. Things are looking up here. This weekend I go to New York City with a friend, L. She has a cool job at the university, and the university is paying her travel and such, and she asked if I wanted to go and take advantage of a free room. Well, yeah. Though it took me about a month to decided that I was going to go.

I leave in two days and get to spend nearly four full days in the City. Yay! And I get to see M and S, whom I haven't seen since they moved to Brooklyn almost two years ago...or wait, it may actually be just over two years ago. Anyway, I haven't seen them in forever. So, I'm exciting about spending time in the City with L, M, and S. There will be music shows...and I may even try for a matinee play one of the days, though that's seeming more and more unlikely when I think about all the things that I want to do.

***

Today is the Epiphany. Today is the last official day of the Christmas season (for the Catholics at least and probably some other Christians). It's the day when the Magi visited the Baby Jesus. I want to go around singing "We Three Kings" right now.

It's also the day that all the Greek Orthodox boys, ages 16-18, in and around Tarpon Springs, FL, jump into Spring's Bayou to retrieve a wooden cross thrown in by an Orthodox priest. he boy who retrieves it will be blessed for a year. I've always loved that tradition and that I grew up not too far from where it occurs. I've never been to the festivities/feast-day celebration, but I've wanted to.

When I was in high school, my French teacher, Dr. Groulx, would celebrate Epiphany in class (even if our period didn't fall on January 6th). There would be two volunteers from the class to back an Epiphany Cake, and in that cake there would be a plastic baby or a penny hidden. Whomever received the baby or penny would have good luck for the year. I got it one year. I don't think I had terribly good luck though. Basically the Epiphany Cake was similar to the tradition of the King Cake...not sure if I've ever gotten the baby from a King Cake either. And now that I think about it, I wonder if the King Cake descends from the Epiphany Cake and was later appropriated for Mardi Gras by the fine folks of New Orleans.

***

That's it for today.

Well hai there!

2009-12-31T15:27:00.002-05:00

Yeah. So October 13 was my last post.

It seems appropriate to put up a post on the last day of the year.

Maybe in 2010 I'll resolve to post more. And most the two blogs I said I would definitely post: one full of pictures from the cruise I went on back in April and one or more full of pictures and narrative of my road trip from Tallahassee, FL to Salem, OR (there was even a commemorative apple pie that was made for our arrival in Salem).

So much has happened this year, and well, so much has happened these past few months. I need to be better about chronicling things better. I think that today maybe I'll do what Shannon does monthly (or tries) and that's going back and looking at posts from the same month but years previous and highlighting the events of the months of years past. But today, I'll go back and find the posts on or around NYE. Yeah that's a good idea. But first I'm going to fill out my time sheet for the current pay-period.

****

December 28, 2002:

Wishing I had money for "wicked cool" HP Legos. Meeting up with "hillsborough people [sic]" the day before. Fringe benefit of having a brother who scuba dives: Florida spiny lobsters. Something about a band...Morgan and Lindsay were friends with them: Loyal Frisbee. And lots of typos.

December 29, 2003:

Hadn't updated in a bit because I was apparently too bored. Nothing much really; kind of complained about not getting what I wanted for Christmas.

December 30, 2004 (three entries; also had just graduated and had just moved back home):

I was bored and wanted to type about something so I typed about how our white cat looked stoned most of the time, posited that he found a hidden stash of cat nip. Something dumb.... Oh and ordered the MS XP upgrade so I could download iTunes and sync up the iPod I had gotten for Christmas (...I still use that iPod. It's in my car in the center console...2nd generation).

December 25, 2005/January 7, 2006:

Got a laptop for Christmas (the one that slowly started to die this summer and has been huddled in a corner since July). I beat my brother at Stratego for the first time ever, and we played that game a lot growing up. "well things are kind of boring now. and so is this entry. oh, and i had one student email me about her grade. i haven't emailed her back yet. i have to think of something other than 'be happy with a b-. i could've failed you because you miseed seven classes, and if you look at the course policy sheet you'll see that more than six absences is grounds for failure.'"

In January I updated the world about my teaching roster (two repeat students) and the books I had read outside of school. I also pretentiously wrote about three books with editorial mistakes and how all were put out by Picador (Dry: A Memoir, Augusten Burroughs; I am Charlotte Simmons, Tom Wolfe; Running With Scissors, Augusten Burroughs). I wonder if I would find mistakes if I read them again.

December 27, 2006 (and this is the whole entry):

For dorks like me at least.

Bridge to Teribithia has been made into a movie and is coming out on Feb 16!!! YAY!!

But I probably won't be able to see it until April (or its on DVD) because of my horrible thesis writing/defending schedule. Oh and teaching. (sidenote: I've still not seen it...and never finished my thesis...these things might be related.)

December 28, 2007 (Blogger blog):

Wrote about going and seeing P.S. I Love You with my mother (I later bought the soundtrack and it's still good). The entry was about how I really liked it, how it made me cry, and how I was pissed that it was billed as a "date movie." "And again, I ask: Why is this a good date movie? He dies and she doesn't really find love again."

December 31, 2008:

I had work off, which is why I probably posted and I was watching television all day.

"anybody else ever notice that, on bones, brennan and booth never wear seat belts?

this frustrates me because booth is an fbi agent, and it's against the law not to wear a seat belt. you would think a show about crimes and law enforcement would have its characters wear seat belts. "

And a post about Pizza Hut's All Natural pizza...was it not natural before?

****

So yeah. That was fun. I laughed out loud at the Bridge to Teribithia post. And now to fuck with a coworker's cubicle.

A whole month? Really?

2009-10-13T13:44:00.002-04:00

Hmm. No post in 31 or so days. Time has flown by. Part of time flying by is that things at work are going really well.

***

Two friends from high school came to visit this past week/weekend, and it was a blast. Most things haven't changed, but the things that have changed are as follows:

--We're grown up (kind of...we all commented on the fact that we're getting older and it kind of sucks).
--We went to the grocery store on a snack binge. Items purchased: Triscuits, brie, ice cream, frozen yogurt, gummy bears, and beer. Of those things, there are three things we would never have dreamed of buying on a snack binge in high school.
--We made fun of people we went to school with. (What, you never did that? I don't believe you.)
--We watched Jeopardy! together. Someone we knew from school was a contestant, that didn't happen in high school.
--We told corny, lame, dirty jokes that are completely hilarious.
--I drove us all around. Well that didn't ever happen until senior year.
--We stayed up late watching movies...though we used to stay up till the sun came up.

***

Other news: I'm taking a roadtrip to Portland in three weeks. This is kind of spontaneous and totally exciting.

***

Okay. Back to work.

Looking back

2009-09-11T11:20:00.002-04:00

Wow. Eight years. A lot has happened in eight years.

A Facebook friend just posited the following question: "Where were you eight years ago today?"

I responded. I also had thought about this this morning when I woke up and the current NPR story began to make sense and no longer played the part of narrator in the limbo between sleep and waking.

Right now it's 11:24 am. At that time I was either walking back to my room in Dorman Hall from Honors Religion in America (REL 2121) in Dodd Hall or had just gotten back from class. Lauren was still in her pajamas, sitting under the covers of her bad with her knees drawn up to her chest, the television remote clutched in her right hand, and chewing on her right thumbnail. The lights hadn't been turned on. She hadn't been able to do anything but watch as the events unfolded. Lauren had watched as the towers had begun to fall.

I told her how my teacher held class as normal, only slightly touching on the subject of what had happened by saying, "We have to go about our lives as we normally would. If we don't, they've won. That's what people like that always want. They want to create disaster and terror and disruption. We can resist by going on like we normally would." This was before we knew about all four planes. This was before we knew about the plot. This was before the towers fell.

---

That Tuesday morning the phone rang before my alarm went off. I jumped out of bed to retrieve the handset from the cradle.

"Hello?"

"Danielle. This is Miss Sharon."

"Oh, hi."

"Were you and Lauren awake?"

"No. I have class in...30 minutes."

"Turn on the television to a news channel."

"What? Why?"

"Just turn it on. Two planes have crashed into the World Trade Center towers and another one has crashed into the Pentagon."

I woke Lauren and did as I was told. Footage of the second plane was being aired, smoke rising up from the first tower.

Miss Sharon was concerned about a plane coming for the capitol building here in Tallahassee. I assured her that we were far enough away from the capitol and the governor's house.

---

We kept CNN on all day. I cried watching all the people fleeing. I talked with friends from high school about the surrealness of it all. We all agreed that it was like watching Black Rain come to life, except that that was about the atom bomb that was dropped on Hiroshima and this was people fleeing from the world's tallest towers which had fallen.

---

I remember the numbness that fell over me. The numbness that seemed to have fallen over the university. The numbness that seemed to have fallen over the rest of the country. We were separated from the events, but inexplicably linked by our humanity. I didn't know how to react. Sometimes I still don't know how to react.

The 2.5 Week Countdown Has Begun

2009-09-09T13:20:00.003-04:00

All I can do right now is sit in my cubicle and shake my head at what I hear and wait for two and a half weeks to be finished.

(Well, I could do more...but this is all I can do about a certain situation.)

Also, I cannot wait for the day when multiple people are brought into the same project (individually) in the middle of the project without consult to the person who started the project. Oh wait, that day is coming in two and a half weeks.
___

In other news: My parents were in town this weekend. They brought up my bedroom set from Tampa. The set I picked out in ninth grade, when my mom took me to pick out my adult furniture, saying that this is the furniture that I would have with me when I became a grown up. They also brought up a kitchen table that my dad hand built 33 years ago. He put new legs on it (the other ones were on the skinny side for the weight of the table) and started to refinish it. I'll finish the refinishing this week (daily applications of Tung Oil).

I took loads of pictures and will hopefully do a picture blog about the furniture (unlike the promised and unfulfilled picture blog of the cruise we took in April).

Complaining Time

2009-08-25T09:40:00.002-04:00

Dear Sir,

When you come up to my desk and say, "Please tell her that we will need to talk to them about this today," do not get pissy at me for replying, "Who is her? Who is them? and What is this?"

See when you don't use antecedents, I have no idea what in the hell you are talking about. I know your favorite game to have your employees play is "Guess what I'm thinking!" However, the majority of us don't enjoy that game and would much rather get to the heart of the matter right away, so that we can get back to that "Top Priority" assignment you gave us at 4:30 yesterday and from which you just interrupted us to guess what you were saying only to have to pass that message onto a coworker because you can't be bothered, and now we have to take more time out of our day and away from this "Top Priority" project to bitch about your over-reliance on pronouns and constant clarity issues.

KTHXBYE!

D

It's def. Hurrican Season

2009-08-17T15:28:00.003-04:00

On Saturday afternoon I caught wind of a named tropical storm in the Atlantic. So of course I checked out NOAA first and called my dad second. We chatted a bit about the current condition until I said, "Hey, our first names storm in the middle of August. Doesn't seem like it's going to be a bad Hurricane Season."

"Wait a second. Charlie was in the middle of August."

"Well that was the third and that was a bad season. I'm just saying--"

"And Camille. And what about Betsy. Oh! And Andrew was the first named storm and in the middle of August."

"Okay, okay. But those weren't bad seasons. Except for Charlie, but he was the third named storm. I'm just saying. Plus Ana is only a tropical storm."

"How tall do you want this table? Have you looked at chairs yet?"

But I gotta say that three named storms in one weekend is pretty amazing.

Luckily, the one that formed in the Gulf (Claudette) was never more than a tropical storm and downgraded quickly to a tropical depression. She dropped some rain here...not a lot, just enough to make things overcast and force me to shove the dog out the backdoor this morning.

Bill's a cat 1 hurricane, but it looks like he will skirt the US (though not Bermuda). It'll be interesting to watch his progress.

Now Ana...hmm. She might be a trouble maker. She's currently a tropical depression, but was a tropical storm. I wasn't really tracking her Saturday evening/Sunday morning, but I'm guessing she was downgraded once she hit land. But she's coming up to the Gulf, and we know that things can change in the Gulf, paths can become unpredictable, storms can gain strength. Hmmm. Ana likes to change her mind. In the four hours or so since I checked NOAA's cone of probability, she's shifted her proposed course: She's not going to be in the Gulf for as much/as long as before.

Grrr.

2009-08-12T16:46:00.003-04:00

Damn it. One of my allied coworkers has taken another job within the building. This is not good.

I wish him well but am mad at him right now. But it's mad combined with jealousy tinged with some sadness.

I tried, I did try.

2009-08-05T10:10:00.002-04:00

This is slightly amusing to me.

When I changed positions at the end of January/beginning of February, I had two weeks with my predecessor, wherein he attempted to impart all of the knowledge of the position (which by the way was impossible because there are little things that you forget about until they come up because all of the big things overshadow those little things).

One thing that he told me, the thing that he said was the most important to learn and remember was to keep my mouth shut in planning meetings for a certain project. That I needed to sit in my seat, with my notepad, take notes, and KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT.

Last week I had a performance review/appraisal. One thing I was told that I need to work on is listening and not talking so much. (I did tell them that improving my listening skills has been a life-long task.) They told me (two of the three men sitting in on my review) that sometimes when I talk, it's hard for other people to get a word in. And that maybe I should just listen. The other guy in the review, a coworker and friend, pointed out that my talking might go back to what my boss had said earlier in the meeting about how I seemed to process information three to four times more quickly than most people.

These two things don't necessarily go hand-in-hand. The "sitting in certain planning meetings and keeping my mouth shut" and the "needs to improve listening skills." My predecessor was not picking on me because I talk too much. The planning meetings had been going on for awhile. Three (maybe more) offices were involved in the project. There had been a lot of talk but no action. That's how it was for the first two meetings I attended.

Then all of sudden. The bossman volunteered our office to organize the project. Basically he volunteered me to do the whole thing. And that's what happened. And gradually I began to talk in the meetings. Pointing out things that were not the best way to do something. Offering suggestions and the like. Mainly I started to talk in these meetings in order to make my life easier when it came to this ginormous project that I had no experience doing. That's right. No experience with this type of project.

So I began to talk. I began to coordinate. And now, now I'm the point person for certain things. I wouldn't say I'm the head of the project, someone from higher up is the actual project coordinator, but I do know the most about what's going on. I have the most time and effort and energy invested in this project.

Tomorrow, well tomorrow I'm facillitating the first meeting of a series of four big meetings leading to the end of this project. I'm freaking out. I have to organize materials. I have to train people. I have no idea what the hell I'm doing.

And then I think to how my predecessor told me to sit in the meetings and KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT. I tried, I really tried.

From the Inbox

2009-07-31T08:58:00.002-04:00

Got to work this morning to find an e-mail in my inbox about some local events. The following is one of them:

Taking Care of you - W.E. Planning is launching the fourth annual “Taking Care of You” seminar to educate and inspire mothers and daughters within the Big Bend community. The event will feature motivational speakers who will cover various aspects of how to better care for yourself and your loved ones. Topics of discussion will include healthy eating do’s and don’ts, getting fit and staying fit, physical exams and their importance, ways to relieve stress, and ways to communicate. Breakfast and lunch will be provided along with door prizes and giveaways.

Way to go local community! Let's keep enforcing gender stereotypes!

Young women definitely need to how to better care for their loved ones. But young men do too. In fact everyone could benefit from learning how to take care of other people, their own selves, and better ways to communicate.

Yep. We may live in a diverse community of academics, politicians, hippies, and the working class, but we still live in the South where women are the ones expected to improve themselves so they can better serve men.

Not many things get me riled up, but gender inequality and stereotypes certainly do. Maybe more on this later.

Hmmm. I got nothing for a title.

2009-07-22T09:09:00.002-04:00

And good morning to you.

Couple things rattling around in my noggin today.

1. I think I'm getting sick. This is no fun, but would explain why I'm tired after going to bed early.

2. No texts from Rayray. This is a good thing.

3. I'm still digging on Miss Tess and the Bon Ton Parade after having repeatedly listened to the album I bought after their show on Monday night. I can't wait for them to release their new album--the songs they played from it were amazing.

4. Coincidentally, my current music recommendation for anyone and everyone is Miss Tess and the Bon Ton Parade.

5. Work is very boring when there's nothing to do. There was stuff to do yesterday, but not today. Well there I do need to type up and agenda for a meeting later today--if that meeting happens.

6. I need to go to the dentist.

7. When I write down passphrases, I should really put the post-it some place where it won't get thrown away and that I'll remember where it is.

8. Keep going back and forth about e-mailing the publisher I work for about getting another manuscript for editing. The current ms I'm working on has been with the author for nearly a week while he does his half. I could have been working on another ms this whole time.

::Sigh::

2009-07-16T09:20:00.003-04:00

I'm trying to decide how sad it is that I'm excited that in two weeks time I can wear jeans to work for a whole week because I paid five bucks.

Last year was when the Jeans Weeks started. It began with just one as a way to raise money for the annual Florida State Employees [sic] Charitable Campaign. It was a hit, so they offered more. And now this year, they're getting a head start (the campaign begins in September), as well as posting the dates for future weeks.

See how (somewhat) excited I am by this? It saddens me that this is a big highlight about my job. I'm thinking that any future employment must be contingent on the wearing of jeans to work--flip flops and Chucks would be a bonus.

Things that live in the sea.

2009-07-15T15:27:00.003-04:00

Orifices and Twine and Falling Down, because falling down is funny

After that last blog post, the writing bug bit and I began to scratch. I really hate that cliche. So I twittered a tweet for help. Asking people to throw out topics. The tweet of help became a Facebook status request for help. The first two I received were orifices and twine. After I finished writing this post, Kara sent another topic. Perhaps I will compile the topics and save them in my back pocket for afternoons just like this one, which are most afternoons anyway.

Orifices, which I first read as offices and then reread and read correctly, came from a girl I went to middle school with, though she may have started MHR in the fifth grade. What I remember about her is that she came from Buffalo, which made another girl jealous/competitive because her family came from Buffalo, and she made it seem like she was actually from Buffalo, so with the arrival of Jessica, who did come from Buffalo, Kathryn lost a bit of credibility. Ironically, Jessica and I sort of reconnected up here two years ago. I say sort of because we were only every connected by virtue of the fact that we went to a school that had about 50 students in each grade.

Wait. I'm getting away from orifices. However, the word combined with the person who supplied it reminds me of this one time in seventh grade during science class. All the desks were set up in a large circle around the room, I don't think Jessica was in that class with me that year. But Brad Morgan was. ~~Brad had attended MHR since kindergarten, one of the few. His sister was a few years younger than us. I remember that he had a nice smile that reached to his eyes.~~ [That's unnecessary.] Our teacher, Mrs. Shaheen, was having everyone take turns reading from the science book. A paragraph apiece.

I was always the kid who counted ahead and prepared for reading aloud. I don't think Brad was that type kid, because when it was his turn to read about organisms that live in the sea, brad actually read about the orgasms that live in the sea.

Everyone burst out laughing and the laughing became fuller over the next five minutes. I say it became fuller because the kids like me who didn't know they were supposed to laugh because of the meaning of the word orgasm, but only laughed because Brad had messed-up a word, slowly caught on that maybe this was a word that we're not supposed to use and that in order to not look stupid we should be laughing just as hard as those other kids over there.

Tapped

2009-07-15T15:13:00.002-04:00

So, it's been nearly a week and no new texts from Rayray. That's good. I'm thinking she figured out that she really wasn't texting P and then became super embarassed, never to talk about it again.

And actually since then lots had happened, but at the same time nothing has really happened.

I bought an external hard drive. I need to set it up. And really that's about the most exciting thing that's happened.

Tomorrow's my Friday. I'm thinking of heading to the beach on my day off. It was either that or Wakulla Springs. But the beach is more fun on a solo trip.

Thinking about outdoorsy solo trips makes me want to go camping; it's too hot though. Maybe I can round up a group for the first cool weekend in fall (I know, it's a whiles away, but it's never to early to start planning).

Look Rayray. Look, look, look.

2009-07-09T09:15:00.003-04:00

Last night, between waiting for So You Think You Can Dance to start and contemplating what to do next in the cleaning of the house project, I got another text from Rayray. Before responding, Susie asked me if I wanted to head up to Miller's for a bit. I declined until I got stuck on answering Rayray. So I recorded SYTYCD and headed over to Kira's to pick her and Susie up for some collaborative texting.

Pardon the caps lock for the first text--this a transcript, how the texts were received and sent.

Rayray: (F) IS FOR FRIENDS WHO DO STUFF TOGETHER (U) IS FOR U AND ME (N IS FOR ANYWHERE AND ANYTIME AT ALL DOWN HERE IN THE DEEP BLUE SEA!!! LOL LOL IM BORED

Me: So you saying you want to do something [Had Rayray said she wanted to do something, I would have said I got grounded for sneaking out. I'm not getting in trouble over this.]

Rr: P its a song off of spongebob [Clue: Now I'm thinking that my name starts with a P or Rayray doesn't want to type PS.]

Me:Ah you must be bored to watch that

Rr: No i love spongebob [Clue: Definitely a young high schooler.]

Me: Why

Rr: Cause he's cool [This is where I call Susie and ask, "What do you say to someone who thinks Spongebob is cool?" And then we went to Miller's to continue this text conversation...cause I needed some help.]

Me: Patrick's kind og funny. Lol [This was sent about 20 minutes after I got the previous text.]

Me: Still watching spongebob? Im bored. [Hadn't heard back in about an hour...Someone wanted to continue the conversation with Rayray.]

Rr: No i just left the park

Me: What were you doing at the park?

Rr: Playing round with Neal and the crew

Me: Anything fun

Rr: I mean you always have fun with boys around

Me: true. what u doin now

Rr: Just got home watching the real world and texting [I've stopped watching Real World, but The Soup had a snippet about the current season, which informed my next text.]

Me: Them real world people crazy. [Please take note of the degeneration of my language, thanks Susie.]

Rr: Hell yea i would love to be on that show

Me: Where would u want 2 stay at

Rr: Somewhere with some beaches

Me: Hell yea beaches. sand can be no fun sometimes ;) [The Bear suggested the winky face--and when she said winky face, I thought about Harry Potter.]

Rr: You gotta make it fun P [Clue: My name totally starts with a P.]

Me: Trust me i do ;)

Rr: Eww P you nasty i was talking bout building sand castle lol [Clue confirmed: Name totally begins with a P.]

Me: What u think i was talkin bout

Rr: No you was talking bout something else

Me: u said it before its always fun with boys around

Rr: But i was talking bout that and sand lol

Me: Moms is calling gots to go

I felt that was a good place to end last night's conversation. I'm also thinking that that will be the last time I text Rayray back. Gotta be responsible about this. It was fun, and I think it's been enough fun.

Fun with Rayray and ditty boo

2009-07-06T09:49:00.003-04:00

Last night I was out with The Bear and Baby when I got the following text from a number that was not in my phone:

Unknown Number: Did you sneak out lol

So I ask The Bear if she recognizes the number, and it's not in her phone. And because the three of us are trouble when together, we decide to have some fun. Had I been alone, I may have ignored the text. The following is a transcript of the text conversation, with some added commentary from your's truly:

Me: Um. Who dis be? [Susie made me send it like that.]

UN: Rayray duh [We puzzled over this...still no idea. So...]

Me: Oh rayray! What up!

Rayray: Nothing girl [Rayray didn't leave me much to respond to here, so we decided to answer the first text. Clue: I'm a girl.]

Me: Did I miss anything after I snuck out? [I was thinking that Rayray was alluding to some lame party that I supposedly left or something.]

Rr: Idk did you sneak out [Clue: Idk gives Rayray away as a high schooler.]

Me: of course i did duh.

Rr: Omg what happened [Clue: Must be sneaking out of parents' house.]

Me: No one knows I snuck out. Cause I'm sneaky like that. [At this point we're anticipating what might be coming and have already formulated my next text to Rayray.]

Rr: Omg you so bad where did yall go [Clue: I snuck out with someone else.]

Me: Let's just say the traintracks won't ever be the same.

Rr: Eww your nasty yall are sick [Rayray interprets this her own way--we're pretty sure Rayray is female at this point, what with all the "Omg"s.]

Me: You should come with us next time. [Not sure how many people supposedly snuck out with me.]

Rr: Why i dont wanna be with you and ditty boo [Oh. Apparently just one genderless person wen't to the traintracks with me.]

Me: dude it was off the chain. gotta go. [Kind of bored with this, plus Idk if we can come up with anything else as good at this point.]

Rr: Ok

Had Enough Yet?

2009-06-22T12:31:00.005-04:00

This morning Susie and I were at a stoplight near work when I spotted the following bumper sticker:

Susie was finishing up her makeup, and I was doing what I do best at red lights: look around at the other cars.

Once I figured out that the bumper sticker did in fact state what I read, this is the conversation that happened in the last two minutes of the car ride.

Me: Had enough? Vote democratic.

Susie: *laughs*

Me: That what that bumper sticker says. *points to bumper sticker as car begins to drive through the intersection* It says: Had enough? Vote Democratic.

Susie: *more laughter* Isn't that what we all do anyways? *more laughter* What other voting is there?

Me: *laughter* Yep. I'm thinking they were going for "Vote Democrat."

***

By the way, I found this on CafePress.com. The description of the bumper sticker definitely solidifies the argument that the creator of the bumper sticker was going for Democrat.

WTF?!?

2009-06-17T14:49:00.007-04:00

Um. So I opened my Google homepage and this is what I saw in the right-hand column. 105?!? With 32% humidity? This is Tallahassee not San Antonio, TX. That's some craziness. I need to check NOAA or weather.com.

This is what I found:

Okay. Once again I have learned that I can not trust iGoogle's weather widget. Perhaps I need to get rid of that one and see if weather.com has a widget.

Boredom

2009-06-15T14:33:00.002-04:00

Sometimes I wish I had a job where I could work from home (though right now I do have a side job that I do from home, though if I had a better laptop/laptop battery, I could work from the coffee shop). Then I remember that I have this super-de-duper cable package and wireless internet.

[That was not meant to be all Jack Handy, but you get what you get.]

Basically during days like today when the workload is light, I just wish that I could be at home, because then I wouldn't feel like I was wasting time because I could actually be watching television, checking Facebook, updating Twitter about what I was watching on television (which would then upload to Facebook), and I would feel like I was wasting time, because at least then I wouldn't be sitting at my desk trying to figure out what else I can read/do on the internet while I wait for the bossman to yell out of his office whatever request/HELP is current.

It just couldn't have been twittered.

2009-06-13T14:00:00.002-04:00

I think Twitter has caused the not-so-much blogging going on over here. I don't want to type beyond 140 characters. Or it's that I just haven't written here and what to blame it on something other than myself.

Today I went to the grocery store. (Life's exciting 'round here folks.) But that's only the lead-in to where this is going. I went to a different grocery store than the one closest to my house (however, like most cities in Florida, there's a Publix ever .25 miles--it seems) or the one the is sort of on the way home from work. Consequently, I had to deal with chipper high schoolers out for summer break at the check out. They were nice kids and all, but it seems that in my wizened, old(er) age I have less tolerance for chipper chattiness at the checkout line, and this intolerance seems to increase in direct proportion to how long I've had to stand in line, and I had to stand in line for a long time (considering that they usually get people in and out at Publix) because of a woman who was waiting on a price check ("See, I told you it was $1.49 not $1.69!") and a nice, elderly couple who were just slow getting out of the gate, well not the wife, she kept nudging her husband on.

Anyway. Chipper high school kids, me losing the ability to tolerate their chipperness. The chatty girl bagging my groceries asked me how my weekend was going. Here's how I answered that (mind you, without really thinking about it, so in essence this was the first thing that came straight from the brain to the unfiltered mouth):

"Oh it's good, you know. Nothing bad or tragic has happened."

Who answers a benign "How's you're weekend going so far?" with that? Well me apparently. And apparently I have become somewhat of a pessismist.

And that was well over 140 characters, which is why I blogged it. Plus I didn't want the following (possible) tweet to end up in my facebook feed: "Who says: 'Oh it's good, you know. Nothing bad or tragic has happened.' When asked 'How's your weekend?' Me, that's who."

Shannon, this will probably gross you out.

2009-06-12T10:47:00.001-04:00

Reading the comments and such about placentas in response to dooce.com's latest post reminded me of a story that a friend of mine told me, who heard it from a friend of hers, so it's totally true.

This friend of a friend was working in the framing department at some Michael's Craft Store somewhere, when this lady and her husband came in with this dark flat thing (that I imagine resembled a big flat piece of beef jerky) to get framed. Turns out the couple saved the afterbirth, dried it out (I imagine them using a RonCo Jerky Maker), and decided to get it framed, like they did with the afterbirth of their older two children.

What the hell? Who frames a dried out placenta and hangs it on the wall like art? Some families hang all their diplomas in the dining room and other families hang all the mother's afterbirths.

Also, I wonder what was weirder/grosser: The people coming in with the afterbirth and having to place the sample frame corners and matting next to the afterbirth, or having to deal with someone else's dried out afterbirth that they leave at Michael's for framing?

2009-06-02T08:56:00.002-04:00

For the past couple of weeks I've been listening to NPR in the morning. I do this every now and then. Switch up between music stations and news radio. I mentioned this to a coworker, and his response was "Gettin' old there, Danielle?" I told him, with perhaps a haughty tone, that I've listened to NPR since high school.

So I've been listening and have heard this one commercial/advertisement more than once now. It's an ad for a MINI. At the end the announcer informs the listener that the MINI has go-kart handling. Huh? Go-kart handling? Who wants their car to handle like a go-kart? I know that go-karts are pretty responsive to turning the wheel; they're all engine and steering really, with a place to sit. But do I really want to be in traffic surrounded by larger vehicles feeling like I'm in a go-kart? MINIs aren't the smallest cars anymore, and I might not feel like you're in a go-kart, but that line from the advertisement would be running through my head constantly.

In other news, I'm feeling like I'm starting to finally get my finances under control. If I keep at my current pace with my editing contract, I'll make a nice bit of change every quarter (they pay quarterly). I think my first pay check will go towards paying off my washer and dryer--the interest-free deal has worked out pretty well. The next check may go towards a down payment on a new-used car; Serafina's gettin' up there in age. She's been good, but I don't think I could financially handle fixing her if she breaks again. And at this point, any sort of big repair is probably going to cost me more than she's worth.

This may sound bad, but with the economic down turn, I don't feel like I'm in as big of a financial mess as I was a year ago. Comparatively, I'm pretty well off.

Interesting

2009-06-01T10:40:00.003-04:00

I came in this morning to find this e-mail in my inbox:

Congratulations! You have been selected as employee of the month for the month of May 2009. Stay tuned for details. As a reward for your dedication, you are being awarded one full week of no-hassle parking in space 482 of the parking garage (next to the Commissioner).

Your week begins Monday, June 1 through Friday, June 5.

Followed by this e-mail:

Please take a moment to congratulate your fellow colleague for outstanding work and for the contribution to Division and Department goals.

May 2009:

Congratulations to Danielle B. for her work on drafting the college placement ITN, working with postsecondary readiness committees statewide to build sample questions for the ITN and wrapping up the CLAST project award with the University of Florida. She has taken on very controversial projects with short deadlines and completed all tasks on time with a high degree of accuracy.

It's a nice honor, especially when there are usually more than two employees who are awarded Employee of the Month (our whole unit was awarded "Employee of the Month" last June).

However, I'm not sure what "controversial projects" I've worked on. But I completed them with a high degree of accuracy!

Also, the parking space that I normally park in is hassle free already, and I don't have to wait on traffic to cross the street since I take the pedestrian bridge. Also, why didn't they send that on Friday so I could actually park in the spot this morning.

2009-05-28T08:41:00.000-04:00

I think that I'd like to take a week off work just read books. It's summer. I want to sit on my parents' porch during afternoon thunderstorms and read.

There's something about summertime for me that evokes reading.

And yet I did.

2009-05-19T10:12:00.002-04:00

Okay. So I'm sitting at work trying to figure out what it is that I need to be getting done. The past month had me caught up in things leading up to writing a contract, writing a contract, and taking care of stuff for one of my tests, among the juggling of other day-to-day activities. And now that those activities leading up to writing a contract and writing a contract aren't mixed in with my day-to-day activities, I don't know what to do with my time.

Okay. I've got nothing.

Had drinks with a friend last night (that's what that last post was kind of referring to--the setting up of having the drinks). It was nice. Randomly saw another friend at the bar--that was odd/weird/awkward.

Someday, maybe, I'll have a post of substance.

For now I will leave you with my current puzzlement:

Why do writers have an obsession with ellipses? And I'm just really referring to free lance/contract editing work that I've done. It's like these writers, who might be new to writing or didn't go through a creative writing programs*, have just discovered these new bits of punctuations.

"Ellipses?!? You mean I can use dot dot dot to delay something or use it . . . to show that someone is maybe . . . thinking?" And then they get super excited about the punctuation and use it to . . . god damn . . . much.

Then there's the em dash. Not as popular among some of the authors I've worked with but definitely getting up there in rank. Some use them well and correctly but maybe too often. Others . . .well . . . they use them--in the middle of a sentence. Or when they should really have used a colon because what follows the em dash is really a list describing something in the beginning of the sentence.

It makes me glad that my undergraduate students never really got the concept--or hang of--the em dash . . . or ellipses.

(Katie: While I was writing the little ellipsis rant, I thought about how you had kind of covered that a couple of weeks ago, but that was just about Stephanie Myers. Although she might fall into the group of writers I was talking about.)

*This isn't meant to knock writers who didn't go through a creative writing program. There are plenty of writers who made career switches to writing from some-probably-soul-killing-corporate job who are excellent and as far as I can tell don't over use ellipses or em dashes (and this I can tell because I base it off of reading their blogs, and they self-publish and edit their own work). Okay, I'm going to stop typing in a effort to keep myself from digging an even bigger hole. But what I'm really trying to get at it this: you can tell who has had excellent grammar instruction at some point in their life.

2009-05-18T11:58:00.002-04:00

Just got a text that made my stomach go up near my throat and my palms a little clammy. Must think of the perfect reply.

***

Edit: Now I'm just going to ~~worry~~ obsess about the text I sent back...too anxious? not nonchalant? Oh man. I always hate this.

Obsess about it: case in point--I update my blog.

****

2nd Edit: Yes! No need to worry...well perhaps but that's something else.

Interest...it is piqued

2009-05-12T09:57:00.003-04:00

I started typing up a blog last night about my weekend. Maybe I'll finish it by next weekend. Time is scarce this week.

I'm thinking of splurging tomorrow on my lunch break and getting myself a birthday present. I want/need a point-and-shoot camera that I can take with me when taking my DSLR is not totally optional. Not optional in the sense that I don't really want to lugging around a giant camera and bag.

Yesterday I was poking around all three (minus me) of the profiles of the people my dad follows on Twitter--he's very new to the Twitterverse. One of the people he's following is a photographer at The Tampa Tribune. I clicked some of his website links and saw that for fun he takes pictures with toy cameras. After poking around a bit, I saw his posts on the Argus Bean, and decided that I should get one for myself. It's only 5 megapixels, but the quality of the pictures he posted online were pretty darn good.

I searched around on the internet and saw that I could get one at Target or Best Buy and also that there is a Bean Sprout model. It's 0.3 megapixels and doesn't have an LCD viewing screen, but looks like it could be tons of fun for random pictures and surprise shots--like a 35mm camera! Because of the price ($14.99) at Best Buy and about the same at Target, I may pick up one of those and buy a cheaper 10 megapixel Nikon Coolpix. Hmm...Best Buy has some decent sales on several models of the Coolpix...and I do have some birthday money...

This just in!

2009-04-24T12:00:00.002-04:00

I just received this letter in my work inbox.

Dear Professional,

It is my pleasure to inform you that you are being considered for inclusion into the 2009/2010 Princeton Global Networks "Honors Edition" of the Registry.

The 2009/2010 edition of the Registry will include biographies of the world's most accomplished individuals. Recognition of this kind is an honor shared by thousands of executive and professional men & women throughout America and the World each year. Inclusion is considered by many as a very high mark of achievement.

Upon final confirmation, you will be listed among a select few of accomplished individuals in the Princeton Global Network Registry.

For accuracy and publication deadlines, please complete your application by using the link provided below and submit your information to us at the earliest opportunity.

Not sure how I was nominated, but I have a feeling this may have been sent to everyone in the building (I'll check with some people in a bit). I don't know about you, but I don't really think of myself as one "of the world's most accomplished individuals." This seems like a Who's Who of business people, like the Who's Who of American High School--everyone's included, well everyone who wants to pay $50 for the book.

Though I guess I should feel honored that someone besides my mom considers me accomplished.

Your PSA for the week.

2009-04-21T11:53:00.006-04:00

[image courtesy of nataliedee.com]

And that is just what happened yesterday at the dermatologist's office. When I went to the doctor last Wednesday (vertigo as a result of an inflamed left sinus passage), the doctor took notice of one of the moles on the left sign of my neck. He made some comment about it concerning him and he would take it. I then pointed out a mole on the right side of my neck that I thought to be in worse condition than the one on the left. He wasn't so sure he would want to take that one--but the one on the left, he'd definitely want to take it.

He gave me two options: make a follow-up appointment with him to take it off or the office staff could get me a referral for a dermatologist in town. I shrugged and asked for a referral. He seemed annoyed. I tried to pacify him by saying something about second opinions are always good; I don't think that helped. So he said he'd work on getting me a referral and on Friday I received a piece of mail from that doctor's office informing me that I had more than a referral, I had an actual appointment for the following Monday afternoon.

So this weekend, as I am wont to do, I spent some time in my head obsessing about the moles on my neck. Thinking that if I had to have chemo, maybe, once I was done with the treatments and before my hair grew back, get a tattoo on my head that was maybe an awareness ribbon for skin cancer and "Survivor" underneath the ribbon. Hey, my thoughts may be a bit morbid but at least there's a positive note to those morbid thoughts.

So I went to the dermatologist. While waiting all of ten minutes (that's a first) I realized that it's not good to pipe in a live album into the waiting room. Headline news was playing on the TV, and as soon as they switched to a story about President Obama, this clapping started. I thought that perhaps there was an audience clapping for the president, but then he started talking and the clapping grew louder. One more reason why live albums suck.

After the nurse took all her notes, looking down her nose at me when I said that one of my second cousins had skin cancer ("Oh, that's too far removed, isn't it?), and after I changed into the paper gown, opting only to have him check the moles on my back, chest, and neck ("I'm pretty sure I don't really have any anywhere else."), the doctor and nurse came back in. I showed him the ones of concern.

Running his finger over the mole on my back, "Yeah. This one doesn't concern me."

Tilting my head to the side and looking at my neck, "I definitely want to take this one and take that one."

Where are you going to take them? How much are you going to give me for them when you take them? Can we bargain on a price? I bet we can since you're so keen on having them.

Then I look over at the counter where the nurse has set up some gauze pads, a couple of q-tips, and a nice shiny, double-edged razor blade--oh and the syringe full of clear liquid.

"You're cutting them now?"

"Haha. Don't ever ask a surgeon if he's going to cut something, because he always is."

"I wasn't prepared for this." (Secretly I was, and only twenty minutes earlier had been marveling at how my always steady hands were shaking.) "I need to sit on my hands." And I did. I mean what else are supposed to do with your hands in a situation like this.

Coming at me with the syringe, "Here, it'll just be a little sting, and I'll pinch the skin so you don't feel it." And he was right, I didn't feel the needle, but then again, I've never had a problem with needles and shots--I have a problem with looking over at the counter to my left and seeing a very shiny, double-edged razor blade and then seeing said razor blade in the gloved hands of a man coming at my neck.

So less than ten minutes later I was dressed and paying for the removal of the moles. They say in two weeks I'll know the pathology reports of the moles. I'm a little nervous--worse-case scenario, I end up with a "Survivor" tattoo on my bald head.

Book Meme

2009-04-20T12:34:00.003-04:00

Taken from Claire over at Incognitus Scriptor, who completed the meme in lieu of recapping her weekend. I will be doing this because I can't seem to focus and get into "work mode." 1. What author do you own the most books by?

This is a tough one. At one point it was Stephen King, at other Orson Scott Card, and right now, if I were to look at my bookshelf, it's Sarah Dessen and J.K. Rowling.

2. What book do you own the most copies of?

I'm a one copy girl. I will say though that I technically have two copies of The Perks of Being a Wallflower. When I first read it, I was floored and immediately made as many people as possible read it. The last person who had it in her possession left it out in the rain or something, and because I'm too nice I told her girlfriend (who was relaying the message) that she could keep it. I was promised a new copy. That didn't happen, so I bought a new copy myself when I felt the need to reread it.

3. What fictional character are you secretly in love with?

I don't really fall in love with characters from books. Yeah. I'm thinking and coming up with blanks.

4. What book have you read more than any other?

At one point I decided that I wasn't the type of person to reread books, with the exception of The Giver, which I promised (to myself) to read at least once a year, that went on for about five years. I kind of do a yearly reading of Harry Potter, this takes place during the summers when it's storming outside, which has created this weird Pavlovian response in my brain, so that whenever there's a huge storm I look at my Harry Potter books and feel the need to read. But because I make strict rules for myself (I'm weird, okay) I stave off that need to reread until at least May.

5. What was your favorite book when you were ten years old?

The Giver by Lois Lowry. Quite possibly Heckedy Peg as well. I had a fascination with it for a long time. I also want to nick it the next time I'm at my parents' house. The illustrations are quite creepy and wonderful. Especially when Heckedy Peg is about to eat the pie that is actually Tuesday.

6. What is the worst book you’ve read in the past year?

I don't know. Usually if the book is put down and not picked up for a couple of days, then it's not getting picked up again.

7. What is the best book you’ve read in the past year?

Well I read dooce.com from beginning to present and really liked it--does that count?

8. If you could tell everyone reading this to read one book, what would it be?

Probably The Perks of Being a Wallflower. To me that's what high school was supposed to be about (minus the breakdown). And I think it would have been like that if, well, for a myriad of ifs.

9. What is the most difficult book you’ve ever read?

Henry James' something or the other. They're all about the same thing really. I had to read two in undergraduate and, honestly, they bleed into each other.

10. Do you prefer the French or the Russians?

Haven't read any of the Russians but have read Sartre, Camus, and de Beauvoir. Some of the Sartre and Camus was in high school, the rest was in an existentialism course in undergrad.

11. Shakespeare, Milton or Chaucer?

Of the three, I've only read Shakespeare. Had I read anything by the other two, Shakespear wouldn't be on the top. I sound like an insolent high schooler. What I mean is that I've enjoyed and understood (without all the footnotes) what I've read, but I've never picked up one of his plays willingly. Oh wait I did. In high school I wanted to read Taming of the Shrew because 10 Things I Hate About You was based on it. I didn't get past the first scene.

12. Austen or Eliot?

Haven't read Eliot--except for maybe that one poem in that one Women's Lit course (ENL3310?). But I've read Emma and Persuasion. I liked them both. But on principle (I've got weird principles in addition to rules), I don't want to read Pride and Prejudice or Sense and Sensibility. Northanger Abbey seems right up my alley. And I can never remember the sixth one, so I guess it doesn't hold much interest for me.

13. What is the biggest or most embarrassing gap in your reading?

Perhaps you haven't been reading my responses to the questions about the "classics." Though this question does remind me of how I felt after taking the Lit GRE in undergrad. Ask me about 20thC American, and I can probably do well. Ask me about any sort of poetry at all or any bit of lit written prior to the 20thC and I will once again end up in the 21st percentile...

14. What is your favorite novel?

Isn't this the same as book reread most? Or is that just my line of thinking.

15. Play?

Don't read much of these. Though in middle school I was a tiny bit obsessed with The Crucible (play and screenplay). Come to think of it, I don't think I've actually seen the movie.

16. Poem?

In high school we read a lot of Sylvia Plath, and like any pretentious high schooler with a penchant for literary snobbiness, she was my favorite poet. My first semester in undergraduate introduced me to the poet Ai, and I reallyliked her work.

17. Essay?

I love Sedaris, but then again who doesn't. I also really enjoyed Augusten Burroughs, especially Dry. I had to read so much for Ned's classes that I can't remember one in particular, but I did love the essays he chose for us to read (even if I did end up reading them during class presentations). And I did love a majority of the essays in 20something essays by 20something writers that I assigned my ENC1144 students.

18. Short Story?

Not a huge short story fan.

19. Non Fiction? [sic]

Also not a huge fan of nonfiction books. i prefer novels to short stories and essays to memoirs. I did really enjoy one of the textbooks for my HL IB HOA class (higher level International Baccalaureate Histroy of the Americas).

20. Graphic Novel?

Really love the Fables series. I've read them in trade paperback, so that counts right? I also started reading the Y: The Last Man series, again in trade paperback.

21. Science Fiction?

I read some Heinlein in high school; of those Starship Troopers was my favorite. I loved Ender's Game but none of the ones that followed.

22. Who is your favorite writer?

I do love me some Curtis Sittenfield. Sarah Waters is fun. Of course I love David Sedaris. Writers who craft amazing sentences, like Faulkner. Capote, even though I've only read In Cold Blood. I hate having to sort out favorite authors, because then I start with one and that lead to another and then I remember "Oh, yeah. I love love love Palahniuk." Also, just read Coraline and it was amazing, I want to read more Gaiman now.

23. Who is the most overrated writer alive today?

I'm thinking writers like Danielle Steele and Nora Roberts. Also, Stephanie Meyer; can you please be less repetitive?

24. What are you reading right now?

I've been working through A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius, but I'm kind of over it. I also started Curtis Sittenfield's American Wife. It's good. Though I noticed last week that some of the pages had been cut and bound incorrectly, and I hope that Borders will exhange it without a receipt.

25. Best Memoir?

Even though earlier, under the nonfiction question, I wrote that I prefer essays to memoirs, that doesn't mean that I don't like any memoirs, because I really really enjoyed Augusten Burrough's Dry--it's even better than Running with Scissors.

26. Best History?

See nonfiction section.

27. Best Mystery or Noir?

I don't read a lot of these, but I did read the first two Dexter books by Jeff Lindsay, and while the write is not so great, the ideas behind the character and stories are fantastic. Though, like most authors, his writing improved after the first book. And his writing was definitely not as awful as Stephanie Meyer's. (Damn her stupid books. I read one and now I want to finish the stupid series even though I basically know what happens.

Hmmm

2009-04-14T09:51:00.001-04:00

Wow. Haven't posted a new blog in awhile. I blame this on work. No time during the day *cough cough*. And at night I am so worn out/down that I don't want to do anything more that veg. Well except for those times that I do meet up with people for dinner or go out to a bar on the weekends.

Anyway. Got back to Tallahassee yesterday afternoon just in time for another huge thunder storm. Generally I love thunder storms but realized yesterday afternoon that I don't like them after coming back from an extremely fun vacation.

On that note, I would like to inform you that I am still swaying from the cruise--not fun--and I came back with 467 pictures on my camera (and I deleted pics along the way). I hope to have pictures posted to Flickr this evening and Facebook tomorrow. Meaning that I will probably do a picture-filled post sometime this week.

And Shannon, we played Bingo. I didn't win. I came very close, and I mean close, to winning a small prize on Monday morning. Some kid won the snowball jackpot Monday afternoon, and I feel that my money went to his college fund.

And the money I lost in the casino is on it's way to stimulate the economy somewhere somehow.

Welcome to the Dollhouse

2009-03-28T10:10:00.003-04:00

This was going to go as a Twitter update, but it was turning out to be too long.

I really love Dollhouse (Joss Whedon's latest series). I love how actors from different series pop up in it. How awesome is it to have Fred back? Well, she's not Fred, but she's a scientist and just as good. They need to put her in more episodes. Okay, well she's the only one from another Whedon series.

So the series gets better and better with each episodes. I hope it doesn't turn in a Firefly situation. But I think that Dollhouse is long enough after Firefly for all the late coming Firefly fans, like myself, to support Dollhouse. Does that make sense? Because, from what I can tell, Firefly has become a huge hit in the past year.

Back to Dollhouse, which I have paused three-fourths through last night's episode--so good. How awesome is Mr. Dominic in this one? "So soft. Like a kitty!" And Ms. DeWitt and Topher in this episode. So good. I think that I like this episode the best so far, because we've had these straight-laced characters: DeWitt, Dominic, and Boyd, and here they are acting goofy because of this psychotrophic drug. I think that episodes like this allow character actors to show off their acting chops.

I am starting to feel like the writers are gearing up for cancellation. Do we know too much back story now? Especially with last night's episode? All the Caroline flashbacks. But then again, it's just the tipping point. We still (well at least I don't at this point in the episode) don't know what the Rossom Corporation does.

Also, I feel like the show has given Echo too many "glitches."

But again, thinking about this now, I can see many different directions for this to go in. We still have Alpha and Ballard story lines to explore. And the Dollhouse could find another use for Echo. The only way to know is to hope that Fox lets them go past the 12 episodes already completed.

A post wherein I seem a little mean.

2009-03-17T10:38:00.005-04:00

So last night I was at Macaroni Grille (I know it's a chain, but I didn't choose it, plus I wanted to drink some wine) with some friends. B had been talking about H's sense of humor; how H slyly makes fun of people--he does this by not changing his tone and acting completely serious, making it so some people don't realize they were made fun of until an hour later.

I pondered this. Agreed. But pointed out that I usually play along with what H has said and keep the dialogue going.

***

Ten minutes or more later (I was drinking wine so time slipped past). I'm talking with B, while H and C are talking. I overhear the following*:

H: Yeah. My humor is self-depreciating. Or at least I think it is. You know, because I do make fun of myself as well as other people.

C: Yeah. Self-depreciating.

H: Because I think I have to be self-depreciating, especially since I make fun of people so much.

I turn to H: You mean that you're losing value over time?

H: Huh?

Me: I think you were going for self-deprecating.

H: Oh okay. Is that what it is? Yeah that's right.

Me: Yeah. Cars depreciate, people are self-deprecating.

*This is the approximate dialogue. Remember there was wine. I do know for sure that self-depreciating was used three times before I stepped in.
____

Flashback to the night before at A's house while were trying to figure out how to do teams for 9o's Trivial Pursuit.

H: Hey. We have enough people to be devise-able [that's how he pronounced it] by two.

Me (quizzical look): Devise-able? I think you mean divisible. Numbers are divisible, a plan is devise-able [I know it's not a word].

H (because he's self-depreciating): Haha, yeah. "One nation, under God, un-devise-able."

Me: Yeah. Except it would be in-devise-able because it's indivisible.

____

I think H has trouble with his "d" words.

2009-03-13T14:01:00.002-04:00

I think that my grandma and her friends had it right when they would drive to the levees in Baton Rouge at the end of each semester and just scream into the wind rushing over the Mississippi River.

I wonder where I could go just to scream into the wind.

It's just one of those days at work. Too many things going on and not enough direction. And not enough knowledge of certain processes.

It's just frustrating.

Copyright 1995

2009-03-06T11:37:00.003-05:00

According to the back of my Publix-brand Menthol Cough Drops, ten cough drops equals 1 fruit. Interesting. And so much tastier than a peach, though maybe as sticky.

The equivalency is valid because underneath that is a statement about the "Exchange List for meal Planning." And there's a copyright. Anything with a copyright is official.

Next time my mom asks if I'm eating my fruits and vegetables, I'll just tell that I am, in the form of cough drops.

When fruits can dissolve in my mouth, keep me from coughing, and tastes like menthol, that's when I'll start eating more fruits.

2009-02-22T20:54:00.000-05:00

Okay, I think I can stop watching the Oscars after Tina Fey and Steve Martin's presentation of Best Original Screenplay.

So far, I'm liking this year's production. Though I don't know how much I will watch as I feel like I haven't seen enough movies this past year--especially the ones being honored tonight.

To avoid work.

2009-02-19T13:06:00.003-05:00

USING ONLY ONE WORD! It's not as easy as you might think! Copy and change the answers to suit you and pass it on.

1. Where is your cell phone? pocket

2. Your significant other? who?

3. Your hair? curly

4. Your mother? wonderful

5. Your father? funny

6. Your favorite? blanked

7. Your dream last night? unremembered

8. Your favorite drink? beer

9. Your dream/goal? publishing

10. What room you are in? office

11. Your hobby? softball

12. Your fear? unrealization

13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? elsewhere

14. Where were you last night? couch

15. Something that you aren't? rich

16. Muffins? banana-nut

17. Wish list item? debtless

18. Where you grew up? tampa

19. Last thing you did? lunched

20. What are you wearing? clothing

21. Your TV? gift

22. Your pets? MAISEY!

23. Friends? fun

24. Your life? good

25. Your mood? relaxed

26. Missing someone? possibly

27. Car? junky

28. Something you're not wearing? socks

29. Your favorite store? dunno

30. Your favorite color? blue

31. When is the last time you laughed? yesterday

32. Last time you cried? monday

34. One place that I go to over and over? twitter

35. One person who emails me regularly? borders

36. My favorite place to eat? sushi

Victory* is mine

2009-02-16T14:10:00.002-05:00

*It's a small victory, but I will claim it.

Someone just called about their CLAST scores (surprisingly they had them on hand), and I was able to explain what each number meant to her.

And when she asked why she had to take it if she had gotten a waiver, I answered: "Well, that's up to your institution," which is somewhat correct--it's how the institution has decided to interpret the Rule. Then I asked her if she had to take the whole thing. "No, just one part." Apparently that was the one part that she hadn't been exempt from.

This, you see, is a victory. I can answer simple questions without having to research them now. Or telling the person on the phone to call the ITA at their institution.

Okay. This is boring to everyone but me, I suspect. Though I did want to share this excitement with the world.

But please, don't ask me about the CLAST or your score or what it means.

2009-02-10T16:20:00.002-05:00

I am bored. I'm sitting in the scan room at work, scanning documents of course. It's a little project I've undertaken in efforts to clear unnecessary documents out of my cubicle. I haven't run the plan by the bossman yet as he's been out yesterday and today. hopefully he'll say, "Great leadership!"--a favorite saying of his. And I won't have wasted time.

The plan is to scan these documents, have him say yes, and then shred said documents (once the secure shred bins are emptied on Friday). K-12 filled all of their bins and ours up last Friday.

This scanning process would be going much more quickly if I wasn't being kind and having Adobe creating OCR searchable documents.

ridiculous

2009-02-08T18:21:00.002-05:00

Um, I just stumbled across an IMDB web page for a remake of 10 Things I hate about You. Why is it being remade? The original is awesome. And it's almost like desecrating the memory of Heath Ledger. That was his break out role in the US.

But why go and redo it?

I guess I feel protective of it because of how much I love it. And the tweens who love Hannah Montana, Camp Rock, and High School Musical (1-3), shouldn't be able to claim the movie as their own.

Also--it's too soon to remake it. It's only been 10 years.

At least do a new twist on one of Shakespeare's plays. This remake has all the same characters--names and everything. I wonder if the script is the same.

The only (sort of) saving grace is that right now it appears to be made-for-TV movie.

2009-02-04T22:24:00.002-05:00

Okay. I think my brain is at a breaking point. Actually I feel like it's at a breaking point.

---

Today I almost cried in a meeting with my boss. Not because he was mean or anything--though he did try to place the blame on me for his boss not liking two RFAs that I did not write or put together or was assigned to. Sure it's a project that I'm in charge of now. But back in April or sometime in the spring, when ONE of the RFAs was handed to me, the instructions given to me were just to edit the text.

Anyway. I almost cried out of frustration. This is not something that is new to me. Normally, though, my mom is on the other end of the phone and the source of frustration is my car or was school or whatever. But my mom was there on the phone, and I was alone and allowed to be frustrated and cry. And also, the frustrations all had something to do with something I had done--well except the car stuff.

Today, I was not at the root of the reason for the frustration. It was my boss's honest surprise that, two days into my new job I had not read four different contracts/RFAs/ITNs (I did transition into the new job last week, but I was just transitioning--still doing my job and trying to learn about a hundred new things). He asked why I had not read those things. Well, sir, I've not had a solid thirty minutes to sit and even begin reading those four things. I had begun to read other things, but couldn't get through those, because your requests that I do other things made me stop reading what I had sat down to read in order to read through something else, dig through computer files that were not my own, in order to create tables and draft policy question responses.

---

Thinking through today, which was also a cubicle moving day where I have to cram two cubicles into one, is making my entire brain just want to stop.

I wonder if tonight's sleep will help. What does help is that tomorrow is Thursday.

2009-01-27T15:12:00.002-05:00

Call me a snob or an elitist but when one of my cousins sends me an e-mail asking for help to fund her trip overseas as a volunteer (by the way any credible volunteer organization shouldn't make their volunteers pay for travel) to perhaps teach English children or work with an elephant conservation program and then writes in her e-mail that any donations to her trip could be considered a "tax right off," I just want to stop reading her e-mail and blog about it.

This particular cousin, while she's nice and sweet, she's not the brightest bulb in the bunch. She's that family member that consistently sends out forwards, even after I've asked her not to send them to me, and also claims that she doesn't have time to check the validity of her forwards on Snopes.com. Another family would constantly send a reply-all e-mail containing the Snopes report.

A couple days after the e-mail announcing her efforts to join the volunteer organization, she acknowledged that she should have let people know where to send their donations (which are a "tax right off"). Apparently the donations go directly to my cousin, not the organization to be put towards my cousin's volunteerism. Seriously, Cousin, this makes me even more wary of donating to your cause. And also, people have read her e-mail and responded with wanting to send donations. I bet one of those people is her grandma, who is a very sweet and wonderful woman.

I also did a quick browse of the volunteer organization's Web site. It looks like a Web site for Semester at Sea or a summer camp for college kids. There was, roughly, a two to one ratio of "volunteers" posing in front of monuments or posing while "helping" someone, rather than those candid shots of actual volunteer work.

Okay, call me a snob or a cynic. Or maybe point out that I shouldn't be criticizing my cousin or the volunteer organization since I don't really volunteer anymore nor have I been on any sort of mission trip.

Riddle me this.

2009-01-18T13:18:00.004-05:00

So I really love CSI. But only the original series. I've been watching it religiously and semi-religiously since I was a senior in high school. It's just a good show. I also liked that the writers/producers figured out how to make the show about the lived of the characters in addition to the crimes...and they did this from the beginning.

Funny thing. Yesterday I watched a more recent episode on On Demand. It was Grissom's last episode. Right now I'm watching the pilot episode and have noticed a couple of things. The main thing is that the set is different, but that's how it is with a lot if pilots. Another thing, Catherine has a sister who never shows up again--plus it's later revealed that she's an only child.

The biggest thing is Grissom's character. He's completely different. I wonder if the writers decided to change the character, the producers, or William Petersen himself. Last week's Entertainment Weekly had a feature article about his leaving the show and the show itself. His reason for leaving makes him out to be a bit of an asshole in real life: "It's CSI--they pay me a lot of money, and I don't have to work very hard anymore. . . .And I just realized, God, as an artist I'm going to atrophy. . . .I didn't want to be on the show because they were paying me money and I liked the money. " Later he ends it by saying "I won't miss Grissom."

Okay seriously? He basically trashed the show and also complained about making a lot of money.

2009-01-13T13:16:00.003-05:00

My brain has apparently flown the coop. My coworker looked at me funny when I asked him to write out a comprehensive list of all the documents I'm supposed to get together for him.

I totally wasn't joking.

Now I'm going to write out my own list so I can check things off to make sure I haven't forgotten anything.

It doesn't help that office is not quiet. This makes things worse. Why do I feel a panic attack coming on?

From superpoop.com

2009-01-12T13:44:00.003-05:00

This was posted today, and I saw it a couple of hours ago. I had to close it before I started laughing too loud. The halted snorting was bad enough. And then when I thought about printing it out to show some people...oh that starts the giggling too. Then, a couple of minutes ago, I thought about it again and snorted yet again so that I wouldn't bust out laughing. And now that I'm getting ready to share this wonderful comic from Super Poop, I've started giggling again like a third grader. Well more of like when I was in eighth grade--because I was totally mature like that, well like I am now.

Okay I need to go collapse in a fit of giggles.

2009-01-09T18:40:00.001-05:00

Alright. I have updated my resume. Upload it to Monster.com or wait.

I might be looking for a new job, I might not be. Right now, I feel like I did when I was looking for a new place to live last year: More than ready for a change, but it's too early to be doing so, and perusing adds just makes me restless and wanting the months to go by.

Life Skill Added to Bag o' Tricks

2009-01-07T11:24:00.002-05:00

I have taught myself how to put footnotes into a Word document. Or rather I should say that I skimmed the Microsoft help Web page until it showed me where to go to add them in.

I should add this to my resume:

Can look up stuff on the internet to make bangin' Word documents.

Ramblings: can cross off my to-do-list for the day.

2009-01-05T13:05:00.002-05:00

Back at work today after two weeks off. Not totally hard to get back into the swing of things...it allowed me to catch up on nearly three weeks of Married to the Sea and the like.

I began a to-do-list this morning that was just supposed to be for today, it very quickly turned into a to-do-list for the week. Or at least until Wednesday. Ha! I just remembered that I did something I can cross off! Huzzah! Now half my list is crossed off, though the three things that are crossed off were small projects, equaling one of the other three things on my list. Now I lost all my excited exclamation-Huzzah...uh...excited-ness.

****

Umm, yeah never mind. The rest of what I thought about typing was pointless. I mean I already had to subject you all to that post I left up after writing it...yeah that one. Let me be vague. Give me that. I don't want to acknowledge that subject...it took a lot to write that post and leave it up. Cause, Mya, I almost followed your example and took it down, but then I realized that I need to confront things.

****

Oh and my sitemete is indicating that my blog comes up in some interesting searches. Like about "danielles smelly pants." And it's the blog, not just an entry, like when those 20 people a week click on a Google search for "cool eyebrow scars" or "cool eyebrow stitches" and the scar blog shows up.

a post in which i am somewhat revealing.

2009-01-04T02:08:00.004-05:00

i finally cried bout the relationship that ran my life for five months. that relationship ended (in a not so fun way) back in november. back then i felt guilty about not crying about it. but then tonight i brought it up again at dinner tonight because i "found out" about something this past monday, so it was fresh on my mind.

then on the way home tonight brandi carlile's "cannonball" came on.

the first two lines:

i was born when i met you
now i'm dying to forget you

while melodramatic (at least in my cynical mind/heart), the lines are true to the relationship mentioned above. the lines made me think twice, then made me replay the song right before i pulled into my driveway. the first time the song played it not only made me think twice, it made me realize that those lines applied to those five months (and beyond) of my life and made me begin to tear up.

the second time it played, i put my car into park and had the beginning of a good cry. i then realized that i needed to suck it up--because i'm hard-headed like that--and go inside. well that didn't do much because i sat on the deck steps while letting the dog out and began to cry again.

during that second crying bout i realized that the reason i've felt that i have needed a good cry was because of this whole disastrous realtionship that i put too much of myself into (though i still believe if it started again it could go somewhere). that realization made me cry more.

earlier tonight i also realized that i don't regularly cry because i tell myself that i am too strong of a person to actually cry and feel these emotions.

argh. what i really need is the chance to say "fuck you" to the person who broke my heart. and this is the first time that i've acknowledged the fact that my heart was broken. and that pisses me off, because i always thought i was too strong of a person to be that vulnerable.

A blog post of substance?

2009-01-02T15:13:00.001-05:00

Perhaps I should write a blog about a New Year's resolution or two or three. But the thing is, I don't really do the resolution thing at the beginning of the year. Or at least I haven't in a while. I may say things like exercise more, drink less, blah blah blah. Those are things that most everyone says; they're generic resolutions. I don't know why I tell people resolutions if I have no plan on keeping them. Maybe it's just that it's expected of it.

However, this year for sure I have one resolution that I am going to stick to. And, I think anyone would agree, it's a pretty easy resolution to carry out through the year. Although I did tell my brother about my resolution, and in his on way, pointed out that at the end of 2009 I might have a difficult time quantifying the results of the resolution.

I can't claim credit for coming up with this resolution on my own, and honestly how many of our resolutions--or anything we do for that matter, thank you T.S. Eliot--are completely original to us. Though not original, this is unique to me: I got the idea by watching TV. While I was home, I watched quite a bit of BBC America, as well as playing the Wii Fit lazing around. And during that BBC America watching, there were advertisements (and please pronounce that the British way since it was a BBC America commercial) for the New Year's Eve marathon of Absolutely Fabulous. Eddy tells Patsy that her New Year's resolution is to have more fun.

This, this is a resolution I can get behind. If I break this resolution one day, well I can just make it up the next day by having more fun that day than I had the day before. You see, this is an easy resolution to get behind and keep. Sure my brother may have been right in that it's totally quantifiable like losing weight and reading more and watching less TV, but hopefully next year I'll be able to look back on the entire year and say, "Yes, I did have more fun."

this is frustrating

2008-12-31T20:15:00.000-05:00

anybody else ever notice that, on bones, brennan and booth never wear seat belts?

this frustrates me because booth is an fbi agent, and it's against the law not to wear a seat belt. you would think a show about crimes and law enforcement would have its characters wear seat belts.

If it wasn't natural before...

2008-12-31T12:19:00.002-05:00

I just saw a commercial for Pizza Hut's new "Natural Pizza." It's made with a multi-grain crust, natural pepperoni, natural cheese, and natural sauce.

I don't know about anybody else, but it seems like they should have been using natural products from the get go. It makes me think that what they normally put on a pizza is fake. Or perhaps they just mean organic when they say "natural." I wonder if it's an advertising thing. Thinking that more people will shy away from organic pizza than "natural pizza." I wish I had been in that focus group. Calling the new pizza natural makes me rethink the other pizzas they make.

Just need to vent a bit.

2008-12-30T11:50:00.003-05:00

So I went into work on the 22nd. The hours I worked will be considered comp time. Before I left on the 22 (at 4:15 because I didn't take a lunch hour), I sent an e-mail to my boss saying I worked 8 hours.

I just checked my work e-mail (I'm still off for the holidays), and I got an e-mail back from my boss, in response to telling him that I worked the 22nd, asking me if I worked the 22nd.

What?

this is awesome

2008-12-30T11:19:00.000-05:00

i think my favorite is the cd. i may try it.

Thoughts (yet another post title that highlights my sucking at titling things)

2008-12-15T12:38:00.003-05:00

I have a few Pandora stations that kind of overlap, but that overlap comes in the form of "Landslide" plays on each of those overlapping stations (Brandi Carlile, Ani DiFranco, Missy Higgins, Lisa Loeb...see the theme?). And not only does "Landslide" play but three versions of it play--maybe even four. Stevie Nicks by herself, Stevie Nicks in Fleetwood Mac (before her solo career, where she apparently just sang songs she did with Fleetwood Mac and "White Winged Dove"), and the Dixie Chicks version, which I sometimes like better. And I think there might be some live versions of the song that play.

I guess Pandora thinks this is a landmark song and all versions of it should be played. Or they just don't have the license for more Stevie Nicks'/Fleetwood Mac's songs.

****

I originally inteded to write a post about how I'm dressed in a cliche-ish manner today...or at least like 1993 called and wants its flannel back. But then "Landslide" was playing and I wanted to write about that.

****

I also want to write more in general, but need to stop being a lazy something or the other. Time to get back to work.

Pi symbols at the corner of my web page...

2008-12-06T18:54:00.002-05:00

Ohhh. The Net is on HBO. I loved this movie when it came out on video. I think I watched it four or five times while we had it from Blockbuster.

At the time we had internet...this was still when having a dial-up connection at your house was new. I think it also cost like 7 bucks an hour to be on the internet. This movie made me want to be a computer "whiz" and hacker. In the mean time I just pretended to be.

But watching this now...this takes a big willing suspension of disbelief. Her dial-up could not have been that quick.

I won't tell you how bad, just that it's bad.

2008-11-25T14:31:00.004-05:00

Nothing brings me crashing down to reality than realizing or remembering that I suck at personal finances.

At this rate I think it's going to take me 2,000 years to get out of debt and have a stable income. It could be 1,000 if I decided never eat again. It could be 250 if I decided never to eat or have fun again. It could be 50 years if I decided never to eat again, never to have fun again, and turn all my utilities off--I might as well just live in someone's garage. Or I could live in the sewer and steal light bulbs and electricity and completely disappear.

I suck so much at personalize finance that not even a reputable financial institution will help me. I worry about going to some random one that advertises on cable or can be found through Googling "free debt consolidation."

Last night I thought about going to a financial advisor, but realized that would cost money. I would also die of embarrassment when the financial advisor saw how much I suck at personal finance.

On the upside, I have a pretty good credit rating because I bay my bills on time and then use my credit card because paying bills have made it so that I'm broke the majority of the month. Well some months are better than others (how's that for positive thinking? I could have written "some months are much worse than others).

So the first step to fixing problems is actually admitting there is a problem, right?

I hope it doesn't end up smelling.

2008-11-24T21:15:00.002-05:00

I'm pretty sure that a cat or some other small animal has crawled under my house and died or given birth to a litter of more small animals.

Why am I sure of this?

Well for one, Maisey has been circling the living room for a little over a week sniffing out some elusive smell. She sniffs and sniffs and sniffs and doesn't find anything. Tonight she has amped up the sniffing. I think she has been sniffing all day and not sleeping. When I came home from work she wasn't waiting at the door. She's also been yawning a bunch, which is super cute.

I'm not complaining because I can't smell it (which I hope is indicating that whatever crawled under the house is still living), and it means Maisey is still sleeping when I wake up in the morning and not standing over my head or rolling on me.

I was annoyed at first, but once I realized that whatever she was smelling was not in the house I was a little more at ease. There were a couple of nights where I was worried that I was sharing my residence with a mouse. But then I fell asleep because I was tired.

I'm really just trying to save my sanity...

2008-11-20T11:10:00.003-05:00

Dear NDCN,

I'm really sick of your running narration and commentary of all the e-mails you receive. Pandora can only go so loud.

Thanks,

D

P.S. I try really really really hard not to join in your conversations, but when one of you can't think of what it is you're talking about, and I know what that thing is, I shouted it out just to get your conversation over with sooner...not so you can involve me in your conversation.

Oh Man.

2008-11-10T09:03:00.002-05:00

Totally wearing pants today that look stained and unwashed. But, really, what's going on with these pants is that they are in fact clean, however, they are stained with fabric softener. An easy fix really: just rewash the pants.

I wish I had notice the stains this morning before I left for work. I noticed them while sitting cross-legged in my chair and talking to a coworker. The stains aren't all that noticeable, but once I spotted the first one, I began to spot more spots of fabric softener. On top of the stains, which are driving me nuts, I can now smell the fabric softener I use, and the smell is starting to become stronger (to me) as I obsess about my stained-looking pants.

And this isn't the first time the fabric softener has stained these pants (and I realize that it's not really a stain, it just looks like a stain and it looks like an oil/grease stain), but the last time this happened, I noticed it before putting on the pants, because the "stain" was in the front crotch area. These "stains" are on the legs, both above and below the knees.

Okay, I should really stop obsessing about my pants. Also, if I stop obsessing about it, maybe I can go back to not smelling the fabric softener and will someday, once more, enjoy the smell of clean laundry, because now it's starting to make me nauseous and give me a headache.

Still stunned and awed.

2008-11-05T08:08:00.002-05:00

I'll admit it. I had some doubts. I was worried that I'd have to live in this country under the craziness that would have been a McCain/Palin leadership. Even after CNN had projected his 295 electoral votes to McCain's projected 105, which was after one of their analyst tried to find a way (but couldn't) for McCain to get 270. But not all the votes were counted. I didn't want it to be a Truman-Dewey situation. I didn't want it to be Florida in 2000 all over again.

When McCain gave his concession speech, my worries ebbed. When it was reported that McCain had also made a concession phone call my worries ebbed nearly 100%. When Obama gave his acceptance/victory speech, I started to cry.

I remember thinking in elementary/middle/high school that I would never see an African American president or a woman president. And it hurt me that American (Democrats) had to choose one over the other; couldn't we have both? But at the same time it was completely exciting and exhilarating that we even had the choice between a black man and a woman.

Last night I watched history. I'll be crossing my fingers and praying that he will be safe as our president elect and even safer as our president. There are too many opposed to him. It sickens me and saddens me that people hate him so much, and that's just based on his skin tone. It also sickens me and saddens me that people of my generation were threatening to move to Australia (Sydney cheered the loudest folks) because Obama was winning the race last night.

I know that change is going to take a long time. But with the results of yesterday's election, a huge change has already taken place. I couldn't be happier to live in this country right now.

Oh My Mama D.

2008-11-03T17:07:00.002-05:00

This morning after I got out of bed, I let the dog outside, began brushing my teeth, and checked my phone. I don't know why, but just about every morning I check my phone for missed calls, text messages, and voicemails. It's probably the result of having friends and a brother who have never been shy about calling in the middle of the night while drinking. Granted, we've pretty much have all grown out of this and the calls, when they do come, generally come during a Friday or Saturday night. Which is why I found it odd that I had a voicemail this morning.

I had been up until one, after an awesome Hold Steady and Drive-By Truckers show and taking Steve K. home. So I more than likely would have been awake for a late-night call.

I took a quick look at the missed calls. Quite a few red-ex calls from my mom. Hmmm.

I called and received the news I was expecting from my mom after she had called me many times and only left one message. My 95-year-old grandmother past away in the night. My mom was with her. She passed quickly and quietly. When I talked to my brother he said that even at the end, Grandma was answering the questions (correctly) on some game show that she watched but didn't like. Her mind was still there, and I think that's all she ever really wanted. And probably all my mom really wanted. It was hard for my mom and dad and my dad's brothers and sister to watch their father's mind go to Parkinson's and their mother's go to dementia.

I've stayed on the couch all day. I did some dishes. Ate some food. Cried a bit. Made arrangements for Maisey while I'm in Baton Rouge for the funeral. Called into work this morning. I'm thinking that soon I'll leave the couch to fend for itself and go wash my hair.

She was a great woman, my grandma. She went to LSU in the late 30s and graduated with a teaching degree. She met my grandfather while she was teaching an English class at a night school business program. He was first generation Italian American. She was an umpteenth generation Southern woman--a Cajun to be more exact. His family wasn't terribly excited that they were going to marry, since she wasn't Italian. But marry they did. From the time they married until early this morning she was Mrs. N. A. D'Benedetto.

When my mom was 13, my grandfatehr passed away, leaving my grandmother with two teenagers at home (my mom's oldest brother was already at the Air Force Academy and her sister was married). My grandmother went back to teaching third grade full-time at the age of 51 and she kept on teaching until she was 72. She used to tell me stories of what she used to do as a teacher; she would leave the classroom, change her outfit up a little bit, and come back in as Miss Kalamazoo, a kooky teacher who would come in facing the blackboard, exclaiming "Oh my. It's dark in here. Why do you have the lights off?" she would quiz the students, asking questions like "What's the longest liver in Africa?"

She was a wonderful woman. A strong role model of independence. And, until her stroke six years ago, could complete entire crossword puzzles in pen, in twenty minutes. The Game Show Network replaced the crossword puzzles, but nothing replaced her since of humor. She had a few bad days this past year, but she was entitled to it, she was 94 and her body was failing her.

She will be missed, but she deserves her rest.

Compulsive Saver

2008-11-02T11:26:00.002-05:00

A couple of weeks ago nearly my whole unit was gathered in our conference going over a PowerPoint presentation for a big meeting the next morning. I was volunteered to be the slide advancer and slide editor simply because I had been sitting at the laptop when we were all ready for the PowerPoint.

After about twenty minutes of advancing and editing, my boss reminded me to save all the edits being made. I assured him that I had been pushing ctrl+s after each slide edit. I also demonstrated my technique. The coworker sitting to my left laughed and called me a compulsive saver (and continued to do so each time my boss reminded me to save the changes and I responded with "Control S each time.").

Every now and then I realize how use I get to using the ctrl+s function. I think I've even mentioned using that function while typing up a Blog or LiveJournal entry.

But today I realized just how bad my compulsiver saving is. I'm at work (again on a weekend) and I'm filling in a column on an Excel chart by hand before I type the entries into the document. I keep catching my left pinky and left pointer finger moving in the direction of the ctrl and s keys. That's compulsive saving. Or a sign that I spend a lot of my time at work typing and saving.

2008-10-30T11:30:00.002-04:00

I feel like I'm being picky about an excerpt from the Declaration of Independence is being formatted for something for work. But is it too much to ask that they use a source that most closely resembles the actual document (random capitalization included)?

I probably frustrate the contractor with my nit-picky details. But it's the Declaration of Independence for Christ sakes!

2008-10-28T09:48:00.001-04:00

I think I may have to withdraw my complaints about having to work on the weekends.

It's much quieter, which lends itself to not getting pissed off at all of my loud cubicle neighbors, which in turn leads to me being more productive instead of having to vent here or on Twitter.

STFU people!!!

Oxymoron? Yes or No?

2008-10-27T17:35:00.002-04:00

Amish Built Electric Fireplace.

Huh? The Amish are building things that require electricity? This makes no sense. Also, they let people come in a film some of the men. It looks like they wouldn't let their faces be filmed.

The Amish have limited orders to two per household.

Ugh

2008-10-25T09:27:00.002-04:00

So here I am at work on a Saturday morning. Why am I here? Well through no fault of my own. I'm here because there are deliverables due today. We've known for awhile that three of us would have to come in this weekend.

However, it started to dawn on me on Thursday that I really wouldn't need to come in this weekend. And I'm right: I finished my stuff yesterday; the other thing I needed to finish for today (for a coworker) could have been finished yesterday as well.

But. There is other stuff I can get done that I can't get done during the week when CCN is constantly interrupting me and meetings cut into my productive periods.

But. I don't want to do this stuff. Why? I have this pain behind my eye. It's not a headache. It might be because I want to go back to sleep. The Aleve I took has yet to kick in...there's IB Proufen in the car...though that would requiring going to get it.

Okay. I should stop complaining and clean out the cabinet where I stockpile secure materials that I don't need any more.

::Shudder::

2008-10-24T11:46:00.001-04:00

Dear CCN,

Please refrain from flirting with me in your weird and creepy way.

I now need to cut my knee off because you hit it with a piece of paper.

Thanks,

D

Well, at least the days go by fast...

2008-10-20T14:36:00.004-04:00

I need to invest in some higher-quality nail polish. It's no fun that my nails are already looking raggedy and I only painted them Saturday.

As of right now, all current deadlines have been met...okay wait that triggered something, but I'll finish this first. And because this is the first time in two weeks when I've had more than a (self-imposed) ten minute break to myself, I don't know what to do with my time. There has got to be work to do. I just can't think of what it is. This goes back to the whole "There's something important to do, but I have completely forgotten about it" scenario.

The thing that was triggered there at the beginning of that last paragraph was some but of work I've been put in charge of recently. I should get to that.

I don't have time for this...

2008-10-20T09:27:00.002-04:00

Dear Nosey Coworker,

If you'd like me to make coffee for the big (going to blow up and prove that we've been wasting energy) meeting on Wednesday, there's no reason to interrupt me ("Hey, I need to ask you a question."), acting like it's an editing question, to ask what time I am coming in on Wednesday (on time) and then ask how long it takes to make coffee. Please e-mail me to say, "Hey, can you take care of the coffee for Wednesday morning?"

Also, does it seem like a good idea to make coffee for thirty people in a ten cup maker? To bring pot after pot up thirteen floors? No, I didn't think so. Don't ask me to do that when there are three different fifty-cup urns I have access to.

Thanks,

D

I'll get to it...right after I alphabetize this collection of 500 CDs...

2008-10-09T10:06:00.003-04:00

Kara chose procrastination last week in an effort of keeping up with things. I'd also like to take this moment to say that Kara is not procrastinating on her synchronized blogging, but is most likely procrastinating her Theory homework (How do I know this? Well she had The Watchmen sitting on her coffee table two weekends ago when Katie and I went over to watch a movie, during that time Kara was procrastinating picking out something to write about for her Theory class; therefore Kara is busy procrastinating something else, and that active procrastination gets in the way of blogging. I totally understand that.).

So right now I am up against two big work deadlines, and what am I doing? Procrastinating by "catching up on e-mail and blog reading" and writing this blog.

However, I have some half-legitimate reasons if I need to miss today's COB deadline (You like that? Fancy business acronyms).

I had been planning this blog out in my head. Half of what I planned has made it here. The other half has been scrapped in order to save you, dear (few) readers, from the total inanity of my usual sprawling blog mess.

In other news, I had a panic attack yesterday. That was fun.

Dentist redux

2008-09-30T11:31:00.003-04:00

Um. I think I have a cavity. Though I am not entirely sure since I've never had a cavity. But I think the pain triggered by biting down on a fun-sized Butterfinger might be an indication.

Perhaps it's time to use the dental insurance I'm paying for.

Shoes and Shoes and More Shoes

2008-09-27T10:09:00.003-04:00

Mya chose the above image as inspiration for this week's blogging theme.

I have a hard time buying shoes. Well no, that's not entirely true. I have no problem buying Chuck Taylor's, because those come in men's sizes.

The problem is that I wear a size 11 in women's. This posed a major problem when I was in high school and needed to buy dress shoes. But during high school I mainly wore Airwalks and Vans (I was an aspiring skater poser and punk kid). I wore the hell out of those shoes, which didn't hold up all that well despite the fact that they were skating shoes and you would think that shoes made for "extreme skating" would hold up well.

When I tell people that I wear a size 11, I enjoy the shocked looks. The shock comes from looking at my feet and realizing just how big they are, unless I draw attention to my "size pontoons," no one really notices the size of my "canoes." I'm tall, so I have big feet.

My second-grade teacher once said I would eventually grow into my feet, like some people are told they'll grow into their noses or their ears. I also wore the same size shoe as that second-grade teacher-- women's 9. Back then I pretty much only wore Keds, or L.A. Gear when the double laces and double tongue thing was popular. I figure that my mom bought Keds for me because she could find "little girl" colors in women's sizes. I distinctly remember a purple pair that I wore a bunch, I don't think that they matched what I would wear, but I wore them a lot. I also had this pair that were patterned in a floral print. I wore those with everything. I even have a picture of myself at Epcot with my uncle, brother, and cousins where I am wearing a pair of flower-patterned pants and matching shirt (it basically looks like a unitard, and when you look at the outfit you realize that the pants should have been matched with a solid shirt and the same for the shirt being paired with solid pants) and along with that flowered outfit, I was wearing the flowered-patterned Keds. I was a style fashionista.

Nowadays I don't have as difficult of a time buying shoes. More and more shoe companies are selling size 11s, however they do make the shoes a little tight, almost as if 11s are really 10.5s, but since half sizes stop at 9.5 there is no true 10.5. I'm sure that there are women who would be a true 10.5, but are forced to either squeeze into a 10 or flop around in 11s. I wish shoe companies would make a 10.5 and then bump up 11s a tiny bit so that I'm not spending three months breaking in a pair of shoes.

2008-09-22T16:58:00.002-04:00

i enjoy all the obama ads that pandora runs. have yet to see a mccain ad. go get those music philes barack!

hmmm

2008-09-21T18:30:00.002-04:00

conversations from friday and saturday night are ruminating in the ole noggin over here.

questions were asked, questions were answered, but no answers were given. just a bunch of circular talking with hints at something.

Housekeeping post--about gossip...

2008-09-18T09:36:00.007-04:00

A couple of things first:

Congratulations to Susie who successfully defended her thesis yesterday (a collection of essays, one short story, and a haiku) titled The Dead Pet Diaries...well that might not actually be the title, but that's what it's about.

Please welcome The Boy to our synchronized blogging. He blogged about the dentist, and even created a nice picture to go along with the blog, cause he's artistic and technologically capable like that. The Boy will be choosing topics after, well Kara because I never got confirmation from Sandra or B that they want to join in again.

Also, job well done to Katie for making photoshopped pictures as visual aids for a debate-like project in her graduate-level Old English class...hopefully she will be posting those on one of her twenty million blogs (okay, there's only four that she actually kind of keeps up with).

And, well, those are all the accolades and such that I have for the time being.

Now to our main event (brought to you by the fact that I have some free time and can utilize that for writing a blog):

Katie chose gossip last week:

Funny thing that Katie chose gossip. I had actually started reading the first Gossip Girl book the day before. I bought it like three years ago, and like many books I buy, it has sat amongst other unread books and books in various stages of reading for longer than it should (I don't generally buy books for immediate consumption; *insert lame analogy here*). But I won't bore you--see Susie, I just broke the fourth wall (twice!)--because I actually have thought about gossip this past week, and at many other points in my life, and writing a ~~gossip post~~ post about gossip that is actually a post about a book with gossip in the title and between the covers is as lame as the analogy I started typing about books and french fries--we won't go there.

The first time I heard the word gossip was in second grade. The girl who's house I stayed at in the afternoon accused me a gossiping. I accused her of making up a word.

I'm not sure how long it was after that when I found out that gossip was in fact a real word and that I in fact did gossip.

There have been many points in my life when I have thought to myself that maybe I do gossip too much. Times when I've tried to remove myself from situations that just promote gossip. And times where I gave it up for Lent. It's not easy. Gossip is an addiction to me. I know that I have seriously cut down on my participation in it, but that's because I am no longer an active member of the English Graduate Student scene--that's one toxic area.

I've also tried to convince myself that what I was doing was okay because, like the news, I was balanced and fair and committed to telling things exactly as they happened or as I heard they had happened.

This need to constantly be in the know and be where things are going on is a thing I realized about myself during my second year of undergrad. I recognized that I had this compulsive need to be where all the "cool" socializing was going on. I felt like an outcast when I was sitting at home missing what I knew was going to be the event that my "friends" talked about for the next couple of days. The fun which I yearned to be a part of and could sometimes invite myself to, since they never remembered to call me. That was a huge realization to me, and I struggled to accept the fact that I didn't always have to be in the middle of everything and that it was impossible to be in the middle of everything.

I like to call this need to be a part of everyone's social outing "CMS syndrome"--can't miss shit syndrome. I'd like to take credit for coining that, but I stole it from an episode of The L Word. The one where Alan Cummings' character, Billy, hits rock bottom and admits to Pam Grier's character, Kit, that he has CMS syndrome.

So I deal with it by convincing myself that everyone else is at home watching TV or reading or doing something equally boring (until I hear about what they did the night before and have to supress the whine that rises to the back of my throat about "Why didn't I know about this? I'd love to hang out with you too at that type of thing. I'm fun to be around. Blah, blah, blah.). But please, no one should feel bad about not inviting me to something, and sorry if I ever made you feel uncomfortable for not inviting me. It really is a compulsion that I am constantly learning to control.

Okay anymore and I'll have to start paying blogger for it's therapy sessions.

More missed fun...

2008-09-15T19:08:00.001-04:00

Check out this missed connection posted today...awesome (imagine that word being sung).

I woke up in an alley this morning with lipstick on my cheek, two digits on my hand (the other five were smudged), and amnesia.

2008-09-12T11:27:00.002-04:00

How fun is it to have someone you can call during the commercials of ANTM?

***

Um. Nothing else really.

2008-09-10T12:57:00.003-04:00

I believe it was through Claire and her twitter followings actually that I became aware of (because I sure as anything did not find it or discover it) this Web site. And I will start off by saying that I just began following her daily postings, but then on a whim starting reading the blog from the beginning (she started in 2001, with somewhat regular postings and then daily and then some postings).

It's an awesome blog. A good read. And because she has posted so much, and I read it when I can, I'm only at the beginning of January 2005. Which brings me to the need to share this particular entry. By the way, she's very open and honest on her blog--after she got fired from her job, she pretty much didn't have anything keeping her from talking about anything.

Writing about Writing

2008-09-09T15:56:00.004-04:00

I've posted before (more than once I think...maybe once here and once on my LJ) about my weird fear/paranoia about forgetting to do something big for work only to have that due date pop up and everyone expect me to have the big thing I've forgotten about.

Well it isn't really an irrational paranoia. Though it hasn't happened yet...I felt that feeling last week and discovered that I had indeed forgotten about a big project. The good thing: I had over a week before it was due...though I did do some mental calculations and figured out that I could save it for a day or two before the meeting.

However, this feeling of paranoia has been plaguing me since the day I remembered about my big project. Though I do remember what it is that needs to be done and push it to the back of my brain because I still haven't gotten to the two days before the meeting for the big project. Then I forget about it, then I remember it, and then today I realized why I keep forgetting about it (almost purposefully).

The thing is, is that this project requires revision. I hate revision. I hate revising my own stuff so much. I hate heavy revision. This project requires heavy revision. This project requires that I heavily revise a document that I did not create in the first place. A document that is somewhat beyond my scope of understanding. A document that is definitely beyond my scope of qualifications and training. And a document that requires not only revision within the document, but revision that requires me to pull entire paragraphs and sections from other documents that I didn't write. It requires that I determine the best placement and combination of sentences, paragraphs, and sections that are beyond my scope of knowledge, training, and comprehension.

Sounds like fun? Right?

Katie please learn how to bottle your insane and amazing revisions skills by Thursday...

Moods

2008-09-08T09:18:00.002-04:00

**Note: The following was written yesterday (9/8):**

So last week I was in a mood...not entirely sure what type of mood, but one in which I was easily annoyed.

This week, or at least today, I am in a good mood. I had a most excellent weekend. I think part of my good is a holdover from wishing my brother a happy birthday (that was yesterday). This first time was shortly after midnight, shortly before I went to bed, and not terribly long after the end of a nice evening. I called him again yesterday morning only to get sent to his voicemail again. He did call me back right away to explain that he had been on the phone with his best friend and was preparing himself for his birthday-song phone call. My reply was to slap my forehead and tell him that I'd call him back in a couple of minutes.

**This is today (9/9):**

Maybe I'll finish that story later...probably never though. I would just like to state that life seems incredibly good right now. Katie, please kick me the next time you see me so that something is going not so well. Or V. Cause you helped Katie out that one time she needed to be hit because everything was going well. I'd ask Susie, but people at work might get the wrong idea.

Hmmm...

2008-09-05T12:47:00.000-04:00

I may have done something stupid. Well I know it was stupid as it was an impulse buy. A big impulse buy. But not completely impulsive. It was a purchase I've been thinking about since mid-June. And I've been thinking about this purchase since mid-June because I was researching products and weighing the fact that I can't really afford anything I want to purchase.

But this morning, like many other days, I did a search for digital SLR cameras. This morning's search ended in the finding of a Canon EOS Rebel XT 350D (body and lens, plus other things) for $409. Generally the body only goes for $500+. And I bought--but not after running down the hall to ask one of my coworkers if it was a good deal. Turns out it's the same camera he has and the price was good.

I don't really need this camera, but on one level I do need this camera. I really want to get back into photography, and get back into it in a whole new way. I don't know how to explain it, but I really want to take a more professional approach to it. During the course of the day, I see things as photos or as a potentially good shot. I think about how much fun it would be to start an Etsy store and share what I see with people.

So this may have been an extremely stupid purchase or it may have been an extremely good purchase (this I will judge by whether or not the products of the purchase begin to pay for the purchase itself).

Read on to gain some trivial knowledge...

2008-09-04T09:10:00.005-04:00

In an attempt to wake up a little so I can do some actual work while I'm at work, I will write a blog. Today's blog is proudly brought to you by Synchronized Blogging and Dentists. And some nice, strong coffee from down the hall.

I absolutely loved going to the dentist growing up. I was the weird kid who never understood the kids who would say they hated going to school, hated going to the doctor, and hated going to the dentist. I was the weird kid who hated going to soccer practice, hated earning the "Hair and Makeup" merit badge in Junior Girl Scouts, and hated wearing dresses.

I never really understood why the other kids would give me weird looks when I would respond to their dentist hatred with: "I love going to the dentist." I loved going to our dentist so much (my brother too) that I went to the same pediatric dentist until I was 18...when they kind of shoved us out the door.

I'm not entirely sure why I loved going to the dentist. Well, no, that's not true. I think I've figured out why I loved the dentist and why other kids hated the dentist.

My brother and I lucked out in the gene pool in that we got our dad's teeth. Neither one of us has ever had a cavity, and we didn't need orthodontic work, and when we had our wisdom teeth removed, our faces didn't swell, and we were back to normal in a couple of days (apparently my dad has his wisdom teeth removed on a Friday morning and boarded a plane the same day to fly to Texas to visit my mom--they weren't married yet and my mom had a job in Dallas for a time).

So going to the dentist was fun for us. We didn't have to have our teeth drilled on. The most uncomfortable thing was a bit of sensitivity when the hygienist would clean our teeth with cold water. We delighted in clamping down on the sucker thing (in fact, I think they called it Mr. Sucker). We laughed when the other had the fluoride tray in--pretending they were duck bills.

I also enjoyed the praise that Dr. Alfano would bestow on us, telling me, "You have the most perfect bite. I wish my daughter had this same bite, then she wouldn't need braces." We could do no wrong when it came to going to the dentist.

However, that changed when I started going to the grown-up dentist. No more Sega in the waiting room, allowing us to play Sonic while we waiting for the dental hygienist to call us back. No more writing our names on a raffle slip to try to win the monthly prize basket filled with cool stuff--it didn't matter that I never won, the possibility existed.

My parents had been going to Dr. Cancio for as long as I can remember. In fact he was recommended by our pediatric dentist, who went to Dr. Cancio--dentists need dentists too. Dr. Cancio scared the...well he scared me, and I couldn't understand why my parents loved him so much. His dental hygienist weren't as nice with the flossing; my teeth and gums were sore for days after. He never took his mask off while he examined my mouth, was not as nice about the slight tartar build up, and asked me hard questions after my exam.

"What's the pink stuff between your teeth and palate called?"

::blank look:: *crickets chirping*

"Well? You should know this."

"Umm, my gums?"

::stern look:: "No. The gingiva."

"Oh. Interesting. I never knew that."

"What's the place called between your teeth and the gingiva?"

::feeling more relaxed:: "The space between the teeth and gingiva."

"No."

"Oh. I didn't know it had an actual name."

"It's the gingiva sulcus."

"And how do you floss?"

"Well...like this." ::sort of demonstrate::

"No." ::flips over my dental chart and draws a picture of a couple of teeth, labels the gingiva and the gingiva sulcus; then draws a diagram about how to floss correctly::

"And now you'll always know what the gingiva and gingiva sulcus are."

I stared at that paper and nodded. Scared of this man who is shaming the mouth that had received praise for years.

Synchronized Blogging Anyone?

2008-09-03T09:28:00.000-04:00

So last night at an A(dventure) Club (plus The Boy) dinner, the decision to restart synchronized blogging again was made (again). So here is the second (third? fourth?) official restart.

As of now the order for topics is me, Katie, Mya, Kara, Susie, V. If you'd like to be added back into the rotation, let us know.

This weeks topic (to be blogged about by next Sunday) is: THE DENTIST.

Craig's List Fun

2008-09-02T21:39:00.002-04:00

So I really enjoy searching through the missed connections on Craig's list because they're pretty fun to read. Some are a little more odd than others, but some that I come across are gems. Like this one:

Subject: If our paths could cross again... - 26 (my house)

Body:

Me: Moving out of my old place, where sentimental belongings, small furniture and cleaning supplies are still awaiting pickup.

You: The sneaky fuck who broke into my house, looked through my things, and took what you saw fit.

If only: I could see your face so I could kiss it with a cinderblock.

***

I absolutely love going through things on Craig's list. It's a nice time filler.

2008-08-28T08:51:00.001-04:00

Shoot. I forgot about Birthday Breakfast. Well I'll just mooch like half the other people (and they never bring anything).

Surviving the (Tropical) Storm

2008-08-26T21:17:00.005-04:00

TS Fay wasn't too bad. The suckiest parts were walking the dog during the rain and trying to find ways around town due to flooded roads. Yes, I did go out and do normal stuff during Fay. Like going to Goodwill to buy birthday presents for Katie's birthday, going to see Hamlet 2 (highly recommend), and playing In a Pickle with Susie and the kids (I am the grass/I cover all).

There were some highlights though:

This squirrel who found a little break from the rain on my kitchen windowsill.

Maisey was bored with the rain. Here she is in one of her new favorite sleeping spots. Well not a new favorite spot as she has favored sleeping on the bathroom rug at all three places she lived with me.

Today, while taking pictures of the backyard for my dad (we're putting in a field fence this weekend and he wants to see the yard), I saw these awesome mushrooms! Aren't they cute and adorable and archetypal? Plus, for the past year, I've wanted to do a photographic series using mushrooms. Those mushrooms, and other mushrooms I've seen while walking Maisey, have made me want to get a new digital (an SLR...but I have no money and need to buy a washer and dryer).

2008-08-21T12:58:00.000-04:00

I'm wondering if the community college that technically employs me is closed tomorrow, then I might have to say I can't go into work tomorrow.

Keeping fingers crossed.

2008-08-20T13:11:00.002-04:00

So I got another new-used computer at work today. I'm liking the other one better since it had been completely wiped before I received it, allowing me to open hard drives without having to muck through other people's files. And I liked it better because it Flash 9 installed on it. Which you would think a computer would come with...or would transfer over from my other computer.

I can download and install Mozilla Firefox, but not Flash 9 plugins...

The worst part: no Pandora.

2008-08-14T13:42:00.001-04:00

calling an office in the alabama dept. of education and getting the hold message: "thanks for calling alabama. all of our representatives are busy at this time."

calling connecticut: a busy signal.

nervous about calling alaska.

2008-08-12T11:05:00.002-04:00

It's raining. Guess that means I'm not going across the street to donate blood.

2008-08-12T09:13:00.003-04:00

Today's mystery muffin from the cafeteria downstairs: bran with raisins. Not bad. Tastes good. I'll get my daily fiber.

I didn't feel like having a hot breakfast, so I opted to take my chances with the unlabeled muffins in the...umm...muffin display case. The chocolate chocolate chip muffins are easy to identify. The blueberry, not so tough. But it's a toss up as to what the other ones will be. Last time I picked out one that looked like the one I go this morning, it turned out to be a very delicious banana nut. So I was hoping for that or maybe an apple cinnamon.

Like is exciting isn't it?

Roller skating tonight so I can pick up my tickets for the Derby Bout this weekend.

Thoughts, of the Olympic variety

2008-08-11T14:38:00.003-04:00

Creepy Cubicle Neighbor (referred to here on out as: CCN) will not stop talking to people about the men's 4x100 freestyle relay that was aired last night.

I, admittedly, did not watch it last night. I was too tired to stay up and watch the Olympic coverage but was, apparently, not too tired to stay up and read two and half chapters of HP7 (because it's been year since I read it and I need to now reread it). I have been watching but haven't been watching as much as some people but watching as much as I can (without getting bored, because admit it, sometimes you can get bored with the Olympics, especially if the only one around to listen to your comments is your puppy, will look at you with the look of, "I don't know what you talk about it. You didn't say 'potty'," which seems to be the only word she actively responds to nowadays, apart from the occasional tail waggle when I ask her if she wants to cuddle).

So CCN is talking to whomever will listen to him (including some poor fellow who called him) about either how amazing the finish of the relay was or how "You should really watch it. I won't spoil it for you, but it was really amazing. Just, if you get a chance, watch it. You can watch it on the internet. My son said you can. He watched it again this morning after he got up. We both stayed up to watch the swimming and it was just amazing. You should watch it."

Well I watched it after hearing him talk about the dadgum relay. It was close. Very close. But anticlimatic for me, after hearing CCN (and a few others) extol the amazingness that was the relay. Plus I kept thinking about the new Speedo swimsuits each the Americans and French (-1 Frenchman) were wearing. The ones many critics are calling "technology doping." I just kept thinking that maybe the world record was "smashed" because of the enhanced suits (that require the wearer to grease up with baby oil in order to even pull it up). Did the men swim faster because they are legitimately faster or because the suits make them faster?

Things that push other things out of my brain

2008-08-07T11:37:00.002-04:00

I was walking into the restroom at work, I started to think about all the different bathrooms that it would suck to be found passed out in with your pants and underpants down around your ankles.

This was spurred by the fact that the other day I nearly passed out from shooting, blinding, blackout pain brought on by simply trying to sit on the toilet to pee (that may be too much information, but whatever). See my lower back and hips have been hurting off and on (mostly on) for the past two weeks. I don't want to go to the doctor about this--even though I now have good health insurance--because the doctor will tell me the same thing my former orthopedist told me when I was in high school: lose weight and tighten up your core muscles.

Anyway, the pain was at it's worse on Monday night, and all I could think about once I was awkwardly, but comfortably, position half on the couch and half on the floor was the fact that eventually I would need to suck it up and try to stand up in order to go pee ever again and to take the dog out to pee. I did toy with the idea of never moving from the position I was in and whether or not I could live like that. On one hand I could: if it meant no pain. But realistically I couldn't stay that way, which didn't keep me from imagining what life would be like in that position and magically had no responsibilities and needs outside of that comfortable position half on the couch and half on the floor.

---

I think, given the choice of venues, passing out at home is the most desirable scenario. Well the most desirable of scenarios would be passing out without cracking my head on the edge of the counter and bleeding to death out of the gas on the side of my head while my brain swelled and hemorrhaged (that's a pleasant thought) or not passing out at all, but right now passing out is the action being scrutinized.

Back to the bathroom at work. As I walked towards the last stall, I imagined what I would like crumpled and passed out on the floor. What parts of me would be visible? Maybe the top of my head, an ear, my left hand and forearm laying on the tile, maybe even a bit a shoulder. What could you see from the handicap stall? My entire left side? Would I be on stomach? Would I have landed on my left side.

I certainly wouldn't want coworkers to find me. Someone who works on the same floor? Maybe. The cleaning crew? Perhaps. One of the many women who come from the floor below or the floor above to move their bowels? I think so. Because then they may have their fair share of embarrassment: sneaking into a bathroom on a different floor in order to keep your poop habits a secret and then finding someone crumpled up on the floor in the stall between the wall and handicap stall.

Then I started to think about whether or not it was better to pass out from shooting, blinding, blackout pain in the stall at work or a stall in a more public place. Would it be better to be passed out at a bar and someone to think you were so drunk you couldn't stand up while you were pulling up your underwear? No. Not good. I'd earn myself a title of "drunk"--or something better-yet-worse than that. At the movie theatre? No. At the grocery store? No. Home Depot? No, because then I would be lumped in with that guy who was super-glued to the toilet seat at a Home Depot for something like eight hours. Any public place at all? Nope. Those are all worse than passing out at work.

In the end, the best place to pass out would be in the privacy of my own home. Here's the thing with passing out, I would wake up. Well based on the scenario where I would not hit my head in the process of passing out.

And don't even get me started on underpants...

Worry

2008-08-06T15:36:00.002-04:00

I have this constant worry that when I sit at my desk without any work to do, that I am forgetting to do some highly important task.

I think I may have written about that before.

Though I do know that there are things I could be doing, like reading over important documents or doing one of those things that we put on the back burner because it doesn't have an immediate or foreseeable deadline.

So I guess I'll read through a document that I have a meeting about next week.

Only problems: noise and what I consider to be a comfy reading spot...but I think I have an idea to solve both those problems.

Exploring Lexicalization

2008-08-05T13:31:00.003-04:00

I've always found dictionaries to be fun. Heck it was thanks to a dictionary in Mrs. Rogers second-grade class that I learned what an Afro was.

The lesson that day was about using the dictionary and looking up words and definitions. Everyone had a dictionary on their desk, and we were told to open it up to any place we wanted, pick any word we wanted, and read the definitions.

Most of the kids went to the middle, but I stuck to the beginning and found a word with a picture: Afro. I just checked my trusty Webster's 11th ed, and the picture is still there. I never quite understood the look she gave me, but I was proud of the word I found. I was the only one who went with the letter A.

I was reminded about that as I was trying to look up a word that began with "doo" and, to my great enjoyment, found a great page in the dictionary.

Did you know that doodle-bug is actually "the larva of an ant lion; also : any of several other insects"? It can also be "a device (as a divining rod) used in attempting to locate underground gas, water, oil, or ores," I wonder if Orson Scott Card knew this when he wrote the Alvin Maker series. He must have, because Alvin would "send out his doodlebug" to find water and other things--he was really casting out his consciousness.

Also, a doodle-bug can be a buzz bomb, which is "an unguided jet-propelled missile used by the Germans against England in World War II."

It's so interesting that this word that parents call small children is actually not such a cutesy thing. I guess when a parent is calling a child doodle-bug, they can be referring to the larva definition, since a larva is the maturing offspring of a bug. But it is possible that the small child in question is very destructive--you know, one of those kids who tears apart an entire room in the millisecond it takes to blink.

The page with doodle-bug on it also has the definition for doo-doo. Amazingly enough, the etymology of the word is (no joke): baby talk, and it means feces (that we all knew). The dictionary then gives an example of how it is used in a sentence (those are always fun): In deep ~, which means in trouble.

I find it comforting when dictionaries treat such colloquialisms seriously. It's almost like a little inside joke between the lexicographer and definition searcher (there's not a fancy word for the user of a dictionary, well none that i can find when I look at all the words associated with lexicon).

On moving

2008-08-05T09:30:00.003-04:00

I'm very happy in my new place, well except for the fact that no matter how hard I use my Jedi mind powers, the boxes will not unpack on their own. I look at the boxes and say, "Unpack yourselves you will." And the boxes just stare blankly back at me.

I did manage to unpack two things in the three days I've been there. On the first night (at 2 am) I found the box with sheets in it and pulled out one flat sheet to cover myself while I spent the night on the couch. The next night I unpacked that box; I put the fitted sheet and flat sheet on the bed, but did not put the pillowcases on the pillows, because the only pillows not in boxes go in shams (which are packed somewhere); I then put the other two sets of sheets in the hall closet--which could be called the linen closet because all my towels are in the bottom, in the bin where they were stored at the old place.

This morning I unpacked the smallest of the three suitcases (plus hamper) used to transport clothes. Maybe this evening I'll unpack the hamper, so I will have a place to put all my dirty clothes. I might even empty the cleaning supplies and bottle of Riesling (don't ask) out of the kitchen garbage can--it comes in handy for moving, since the last thing I take are the garbage can and cleaning supplies.

The best part about moving, other than having a bigger place and no roommate is the help that I had to pack. The following picture is one reason why you should ask Susie to help you pack up your kitchen (the other reason is that she packs kitchen boxes efficiently):

Amusing...to me at least

2008-08-04T16:44:00.002-04:00

Most of you know where I work and the size of the building. For those who don't, I can tell you that it's a multi-floor building (and when I say multi, I mean multi). I don't want to say where I work here...that would be dumb...well I might have mentioned it a year ago, which was dumb.

On every floor that has offices, there are bulletin boards in the hallway leading to the bathroom. I'm assuming the bulletin boards are for "public" use, since people try to rent out their houses via the bulletin boards or find homes for stray kittens. But there are two notices that amuse me greatly, and both have been up for a long time. Both are black type on white printer paper--nothing fancy, just to the point.

The first one on the board simply reads: "Childcare in my home 000-0000." The letters are in all caps and the message is centered on the paper in 24 (or so) pt. Times New Roman. The sign seems sketchy to me, and Susie agreed with me a couple of months ago. Nothing about the person's qualifications, nothing about the person other than their phone number, no pictures of happy smiling children playing in someone's den, no hours, no location--simply "in my home," which sounds creepy anyway. I wonder if the bulletin poster has received any calls regarding the advertisement of childcare in their home.

The second bulletin that amuses me is a bit longer, making it hard to time from memory. But I want to introduce the creator of the first bulletin to the creator of the second bulletin (when I walk by the bulletin board I am tempted to place the pieces of paper next to each other in hopes the creators will find each other). The font on the second bulletin is about 16 pt. Times New Roman, bold, but not centered, justified I think.

It begins like this: "****Urgent! After school childcare needed for my school-age children immediately." It goes on, informing the reader that they would (should they be interested) pick the kids up from school in the afternoon and stay with them until the parent arrives home. This bulletin has been up for months, and last year's school year is over (I should let it be known that I am a firm believer in taking down a bulletin like this one once the position/service/whatever has been filled/completed/whatever). I often wonder if that parent found the urgent and immediate after-school care needed for the school-age children.

And that is it for now because the workday is over and I must go home and liberate the pup from her crate.

2008-07-30T12:17:00.002-04:00

No matter how quickly i remove sheets from the dryer they continue to stay wrinkled. I don't know why this is. Even when I spread the fitted sheet out and tuck the flat sheet in, the wrinkles stay.

While folding the still-warm-from-the-dryer, permanently-wrinkled, striped sheets, I began to think about how jealous I was of Martha Stewart's mangle, also known as a rotary iron. It's used mainly for sheets and table clothes, and appears to be useful for ironing jeans and shirt cuffs.

I saw Martha (I can use her first name because we're tight like that) use her mangle on her show one day. She explained that she has a whole room in her upstate New York house devoted to ironing and her mangle. Martha told the studio audience, while pressing some sheets, that when she's stressed out or looking for some fun, she goes to her ironing room and mangles some sheets. Apparently guests notice and appreciate when their sheets are not only unwrinkled but crisp as well. I wonder if she uses her bone folder to get a nice crease on the sheets when she turns the beds down for her guests.

Speaking of Martha and her guests and her house, I read an article a short ways back about how she sets up one of her houses for guests. First they must swap their shoes for either slippers or nonskid socks, because no one is allowed to wear shoes in Martha's houses. She also leaves out binoculars and a map of the state forest/park and plans out everyone's day for them. She also has coffee makers and mini fridges so if guests don't want to see anyone else in the morning, they don't have to.

Martha's weekend entertaining makes me thing of the BBC series Manor House and all that was done to prepare for weekend guests, and like Sir John and Lady Olliff-Cooper I'm pretty sure that Martha barely does any of the prep work for her weekenders. Also, she did mention in the article that she hires a chef for the weekend since she wants to spend her time with her guests, not cooking. Though I will say that most people enjoy cooking for their guests and having the guests gather in the kitchen.

What I really want to know is how I can become one of Martha's house guests.

I think I have another Martha posts brewing in my head...so stay tuned.